All that the conscious ego can do is to formulate wishes, which are then carried out by forces which it controls very little and understands not at all.
Aldous Huxley
What do you figure happens when we have looked through our wishes and will and realize that they are empty because we are content and engaged in the present moment? This creative force Aldous Huxley discovers runs the show.
In accordance with the latent tendencies of each, the One whose function it is to ordain makes each to act. What will not happen will never happen, whatever effort one may put forth. And what will happen will not fail to happen, however much one may seek to prevent it. This is certain. The part of wisdom therefore is to stay quiet. (Ramana Maharshi)
There is a river of separation that subconsciously drifts towards the ocean of Oneness in sin and virtue. In time, the river is endless, while in the here and now Oneness is already reached. The trick is to see the illusion in separation and the beauty in the Oneness. Either way, part of the wisdom is to stay quiet.
We first have to admit to
what we think we are,
or wish what we could be,
before we can awake to
our illusionary thinking,
or our wishful escapes
and discover “no self”.
First the drive to lecture went,
then the desire to be someone left.
How did I accomplish this transformation?
It was an insight of sorts; I didn’t like the professor,
and being someone seemed pale in comparison to being.
We can only let go of something if we feel content.
It is simultaneous—we gain as we let go.
We trade drive with effortless being.
The power of now calls the shots.
The other day I used a different deodorant my wife had brought and broke out in rashes that lingered for a long time. Maybe you had a rash too then you will know that scratching feels good, but it doesn’t solve anything. The rash continues. If anything, you irritate the skin even more once you scratch continuously. Also, mysteriously, when we are truly captured by the moment, all discomfort disappears. I also observed, when I activated my kundalini energy, the itching also stops. Alas, all those remedies were temporary. The itching always returned.
Long story cut short, I didn’t do anything about it and just became aware of the desire to itch and mostly refrained from it. I viewed my allergic outbreak as a spiritual lesson. After a few weeks the itch was gone as mysteriously as it went. One change I did make, I stopped using deodorants altogether and actually don’t miss it at all. What is the spiritual lesson? Don’t engage with the ego. It’s just like with a rash, it temporarily feels good if we entertain the ego but the underlying craving or aversion never goes away. So become sensitive and observe, “damn it, I am scratching again!”
Do you see the similarities? Only true healing makes our problems go away.
Son, listen. These are the characteristics of devils. That which is called ‘devil’ is not some actual great big black thing that scares and petrifies whoever sees it. A devil is anything that obstructs the achievement of freedom. Therefore, even loving and affectionate friends become devils with regard to freedom. Most of all, there is no greater devil than this fixation to a self. So until this ego-fixation is cut off, all the devils wait with open mouths. For that reason, you need to exert yourself at a skillful method to sever the devil of ego-fixation. (Machig Labdron 1055-1154)
Spiritual teachers tell us to be mindful of attachments, projections and other self-induced illusions, yet, who is the one who is minding the watcher?
ACIM writes, “God is not mocked” is not a warning but a reassurance. Life is a perfect feedback mechanism, and all we have to do is to listen.
Awareness is the surprise or the reassurance of the one being mindful. When we are surprised, we can learn something about ourselves.
You can be really depressed reading Machig Labdron’s warning, and you can be joyful. Ego can be spotted here and now and seeing is knowing.
“Awareness is” describes the curious case of the disappearing self. It’s a presence before thoughts. It’s a happening without the self being involved. Nisargadatta Maharaj describes the “I Am” state as, “on the inside I am nothing, on the outside I am love.” We all have experienced this pure presence but the question is how to to make it a permanent feature of our life. Self-inquiry is the way—to recognize wrong values and false identifications. “Awareness is” speaks for itself, otherwise let’s be mindful and self-aware.
