The Hidden Meaning in Our Pain

 One day, a student shared his experiences. He said he often felt wronged, became a scapegoat, and didn’t understand what was happening. I felt that such experiences do not arise without reason. Perhaps one is carrying a deep capacity for compassion, or perhaps there is a need to transcend the pattern of being wronged—or both. No one can give a definitive answer; it must be seen directly through one’s own awareness.

 

When we are forced to take the blame, if we simply blame others and believe they should carry the responsibility, we tend to remain in a state of being wronged and misunderstood. This is because we have not yet developed the clarity and inner strength to understand the situation fully, and so the pattern continues. When we keep blaming others, we remain unable to transcend it.

 

If we carry the energy of being despised, disliked, or wronged, we may temporarily soothe ourselves by saying it is entirely the fault of others. However, we can also choose a different path: to release this inner burden by understanding the situation more deeply, loosening the points where we are stuck, and gradually dissolving old patterns.

 

The first response keeps us trapped in repetition, continuing to experience being wronged. The second allows us to step out of this cycle and loosen the pattern of being despised.

 

The pain you are experiencing now may also be connected to pain you once caused others. In this sense, pain becomes an opportunity—to understand the suffering of others, and to stop repeating the same harm. When you are fully present with your pain, you are also beginning to end it.

 

If you resist it—“No, don’t hurt me. Why are you blaming me? Why are you excluding me? I hate this”—then more resistance arises, and with it, more accumulated suffering.

 

When you stay present with the pain instead of resisting it, the cycle begins to dissolve. But when you resist, you reinforce it.

 

To take the pain is to take responsibility for what arises within your experience. Once fully met, it no longer remains as suffering in the same way. There is no need to fear it. In a sense, you are burning old karma. If you take on a portion, something is released; if you avoid it completely, it remains unchanged. This is why presence with pain is important.

 

Do not rush to escape. Simply allow it to be seen and felt, until it naturally releases itself. As layers fall away, your true nature begins to emerge. When this nature is revealed, there is liberation.

 

Deep within us, this nature is always present—a clear, unpolluted state of being. Sometimes we return to it through directly experiencing pain, which strips away illusion and reveals what is real.

 

Thus, the pain you experience now serves two purposes: first, to help you understand; second, to reveal how painful it is to hurt others and to be hurt. When one suffers, the other suffers as well. When this is truly seen, the cycle of harm can end.

 

This is, perhaps, the deepest meaning behind suffering: it cannot be fully understood through words alone. It must be experienced directly. When you meet it with sincerity, your suffering begins to dissolve.

 

So there is meaning beneath suffering. Without directly experiencing pain, we cannot truly understand others’ pain or our own. When we do not fully face it, it does not end. The essential step is to meet it fully—then the pain itself begins to transform.

 

Once, during a therapeutic massage, I felt as if I had been pressed by an elephant. The pain went deep into the bone. Yet I did not run away; I stayed with it and allowed it to be felt fully. Afterward, I was no longer afraid of pain.

 

In your darkest moments, when you feel you can no longer continue, you may discover your blind spots. In this way, suffering becomes a lesson for the soul. If, in suffering, we do not observe or become aware, then the suffering is not truly understood—and its message is lost.

 

By Suzhen Liu

 

If you enjoy Suzhen Liu’s writings, please check out her latest book, “Discover Love Within—Release your suffering,” available on Amazon

 

https://www.amazon.com/Discover-Love-Within-Release-Suffering/dp/0999251732

Let the moment speak for itself

 It’s a strange notion that we will be enlightened in the future. Circumstances change, but we always carry the same “me-energy” with us. So what is it that we aim to achieve on a spiritual quest?

Maybe we can say that we can consciously work on some baggage that we have been carrying around. Maybe we can gravitate towards some high energy environment and manage to no longer be pulled into low frequency activities. So what really changes is the available energy at our disposal in relation to the interfering obstacles on our path. In principle, we don’t need years for that. We can make the adjustment today.

What we are really after is not the elimination of “me-energy,” it’s the ability to look right through it so that the moment at hand can speak for itself.

To Connect with Oneself Is to Connect with Our Feelings

 Many years ago, when I was living in the mountains, I went through a deep process of “loss.” In the beginning, I could not even name what I was feeling. There were no words for it, no label. Sometimes feelings do not first appear as thoughts, but simply as sensations within us. Only later did I come to call it “loss.”

 

This feeling was very easy to overlook. It was subtle and quiet — a sense of emptiness, powerlessness, and losing interest in life. That was how it first appeared.

 

I began simply by paying attention to this empty feeling. Whether I was walking, eating, practicing qigong, or meditating, I stayed aware of it. I had no intention of changing it or making it become something else. I simply paid attention and followed this feeling for three months.

 

During those three months, vague images of my parents fighting began to surface through my attention. I recognized that this feeling was connected to those memories, so I stayed with the images of them fighting. I remained there quietly, without any intention or judgment.

 

As the images surfaced again and again, something inside me was triggered. It was not just one feeling, but twenty or thirty different feelings arising together. Each time a feeling surfaced, I stayed present with it.

 

As long as I was willing to remain with these feelings, the events and images deeply imprinted in my consciousness began to change. The energy itself started to transform.

 

It changed, changed, changed, then paused. I paused with it. Then it continued changing again. Slowly, the feeling of loss began to dissolve. Eventually, the anger and the feeling of being neglected completely disappeared and transformed into a subtle sense of joy.

 

In those moments of stillness, I saw how deeply I had needed my parents and how entangled I was in their relationship. I saw many things clearly. One simple feeling of loss brought forth countless memories and thoughts.

 

At the beginning, I did not know how long this process would take. I simply stayed with it naturally and attentively. In the end, it took three months.

 

During this process of paying attention, there were times when I felt depressed, and times when I cried without understanding why. Yet when I cried, thoughts and memories would emerge, and I began to understand more deeply. I discovered that there were so many stories connected to this feeling of loss.

 

After three months, I fully understood it. It no longer disturbed me because it had transformed into another kind of energy.

When the energy of loss finally came to an end, love naturally arose. I completely understood everything that had happened. There were no words like, “I forgive you now.” Instead, there was simply a deep connection with my parents — a connection arising from a very profound place within me.

 

At the same time, I was also connecting with myself. In truth, I was connecting with my own wounds. This is the key.

 

All of my learning and understanding have come from this kind of attention. Real realization comes through direct observation and presence. Understanding gained merely from listening to others often remains on the surface, but realization born from deep attention is direct and transformative.

 

Most of the time, when we feel loss, we immediately want to escape from it. We distract ourselves by watching movies, seeking entertainment, or turning away from the feeling. For a moment, the feeling disappears, and we think we no longer need to face it. But this is never truly the case.

 

Do not say, “I want to get rid of this,” or “I want to run away.” Do not hold any attitude against the feeling. When we stop resisting, we can begin to look at these feelings one by one.

 

This kind of attention is a form of cleansing through awareness. During the process of paying attention, the content of our consciousness begins to transform. Our thinking patterns change naturally and effortlessly. Attention itself is already a form of action and transformation. Through it, we stop recreating the same unconscious patterns.

 

Without genuine attention, spiritual practice easily becomes an illusion. Attention is the living energy of consciousness itself. If we do not truly face and realize our own pain, then merely saying, “I feel miserable, lost, and unwilling,” has little meaning.

 

By Suzhen Liu

 

If you enjoy Suzhen Liu’s writings, please check out her latest book, “Discover Love Within—Release your suffering,” available on Amazon

 

 https://www.amazon.com/Discover-Love-Within-Release-Suffering/dp/0999251732

Go within and let go

 A car was stuck in a snowstorm. Frantically the driver tried to get out of the hole he had dug for himself, but the faster he hid the pedal, the more the wheels spun out of control. A passerby came by and asked him for a couple of mats, placed them behind the back tires and instructed the driver to rock gently back and forth. Amazingly, with a few iterations the car found traction on the road again. 

The problem with the spiritual quest for most of us is that, the quest itself! That’s how we have been programmed, when an interference appears go after it with all your might. Mind over matter, right? The journey to the depth of our being is the opposite. It’s a letting go and not a reaching towards something else. Most teachers give you a method, something to do. Be with the obstacle and go inside instead.

I once had a dream. A demon chased me. We wrestled. He was full of muscles and had a face that looked grotesque, just as we picture a demon to look like. Amazingly we were on equal footing and then I found the secret of how to beat him. The calmer I got the more furious and weaker he became. Soon he was gone with the wind and I woke up relaxed and happy even. Go within and let go!

Pain as a Doorway to Awakening

 When the issue is truly understood, the pain begins to dissolve on its own. When you sincerely try to understand your pain, it opens its door to you. To come into contact with pain, we must open our hearts and look honestly at our patterns, attitudes, and beliefs. The moment we are willing to see clearly, the pain begins to move and transform.

 

For example, there was a student who had been ill for a long time. Even after seeing doctors and attending counseling, she still could not recover. Eventually, she came to me for a family energy session. During the session, it became clear that there was a voice within her saying that she did not want to get well. When such a belief exists in the unconscious mind, naturally, many helpful suggestions and opportunities for healing are pushed away.

 

Why would someone not want to recover? Perhaps because illness brings love, care, and attention. Many of us have had similar experiences in childhood. When we caught a cold, we did not need to go to school, we could sleep in, our mother might cook rice porridge for us, our father might come home earlier, and perhaps we would even receive extra care and comfort.

 

So there may be hidden benefits in remaining unwell. But this truth cannot be forced upon someone; she must discover it for herself and be honest enough to admit it. On one side, she kept searching for healing by seeing doctors, while on the other side, a part of her did not want to recover. Perhaps one day, when she becomes tired of the inner conflict and finally admits, “Actually, a part of me does not want to get well,” that very moment may become the beginning of true transformation. From there, growth, healing, and inner awakening can begin.

 

In truth, these wounds are only energy. We are afraid to face them because we resist what we feel. Yet when we dare to look directly at the cloud, it often begins to change and even disappear. The key is simply to admit what is there, be honest, and remain present with it.

 

The discomfort we feel in the beginning can gradually transform into clarity and silence when we stay present with it. Perhaps you have never experienced this before. In reality, discomfort, silence, and clarity are not separate—they are deeply connected. At first, the process can feel very difficult, but once the energy has finished moving through us, we may suddenly feel that life is meaningful, extraordinary, and worthwhile.

 

Everyone feels that their pain is immense, as though they are the person suffering the most in the world. Yet often, what truly happens is that we spend our lives escaping pain because we are afraid to remain with it. If we can learn to stay present with our pain and understand the energy within it, it can offer profound insight into our lives and relationships. Then we may discover that there is a vast space, compassion, and love already living within us.

 

By Suzhen Liu

 

If you enjoy Suzhen Liu’s writings, please check out her latest book, “Discover Love Within—Release your suffering,” available on Amazon

 

https://www.amazon.com/Discover-Love-Within-Release-Suffering/dp/0999251732

The OM Method

 Huineng (683-713) was a firewood collector in Southern China when he heard a monk recite the Diamond Sutra, specifically the line “let your mind flow without dwelling on anything” and something shifted in him. He joined a zen school and soon became an—inofficial—master.

Someone shared his story yesterday and the expression “One Mind” popped into my head. The holy Hindu sound OM becomes thus an acronym for One Mind. Separate mind in contrast has the acronym sm—short for small—which is quite accurate as a description. Ego stands for littleness!

We cannot objectively monitor thinking or feelings because at the moment when the thought pops up we are that. Disagreeing with it or trying to control what we think and feel is as effective as pushing a basketball under water. It comes back with a splash! Instead we are mindful of our self-generated constraints on life,

The One Mind method is a feeling, sensing, seeing and knowing when we operate in a self-imposed low frequency environment and we just stay with it. Being led by our separate mind creates issues and takes effort, The One Mind method is effortless. A mere riding of higher energies that are available to everyone everytime. 

The Power of Self-Awareness and Presence

If we pay attention, we will discover that there are repetitive patterns within our suffering. Something happens, we react, emotions arise—anger, hurt, frustration, confrontation—and beneath all of these reactions lies a belief system.

 

Since the same patterns keep repeating, can we begin to ask whether there is a deeper meaning behind them? What are these recurring pains trying to teach us?

 

We all long for a beautiful and happy life, yet reality is often different from what we expect. When we encounter resistance and difficulties, we immediately want to resolve them. If we cannot, we feel trapped, worried, and tormented. Some people cannot sleep at night because their minds keep cycling through the same thoughts. Wherever they go, they still feel stuck, unable to break free.

 

Can we become aware of what is happening in these moments? Whether we try to move east or west, we are still attempting to solve the same issue. But are these thoughts truly real? Or are they projections created by the mind? Are they limited by our past experiences and conditioning? Where can this way of thinking ultimately lead us? If we continue responding in the same way, will we not keep repeating the same pain again and again?

 

At this moment, the most important thing is self-awareness.

The moment we become obsessed with solving the issue, we often fall deeper into the trap of the issue itself and into the same repetitive pattern. That is why the same reactions, emotions, beliefs, and wounds continue to arise. Naturally, we cannot transcend what we keep unconsciously repeating.

 

When we stop falling into the same mental patterns, the next step is to face our pain directly. This is one of the most difficult parts of inner growth, because when pain arises, our instinct is usually to run away from it. Yet escaping only brings us back into the same cycle again.

 

This is why willingness is so important.

 

It is like when a couple says, “I do” during a wedding ceremony. No matter what happens, they choose not to leave. In the same way, when we are willing to stay present with our pain, we begin to observe the places where we feel stuck, the places we cannot move through, and the parts of ourselves we cannot yet accept.

 

Why is there struggle in relationships? For example, we may want someone to place us first and love us wholeheartedly. When these expectations are not fulfilled, strong emotions arise. But beneath those emotions, is there a deeper pain—the inability to accept the feeling of “not being loved”? If so, can we remain present with that feeling instead of running away from it?

Or perhaps we constantly push ourselves to succeed. What belief lies beneath that pressure? Could it be that we cannot accept failure or disappointment? If so, can we stay present with the feeling of failure itself?

 

What does it mean to be present?

 

It means that when resistance, rejection, or discomfort arises, we do not immediately escape or react. Instead, we observe the thoughts behind the resistance and wholeheartedly remain with what we are experiencing.

 

When we are truly present, a sense of peace begins to emerge. A deep silence appears within us. And from this silence, wisdom—and even love—can arise naturally.

 

So when we face the pain we cannot transcend, accept, or move beyond, the power of simply being present with it is immeasurable.

 

Everything that happens will eventually pass. Is it not true that worry, happiness, ease, and discomfort all come and go? Our worries will also pass. The deeper issue lies in our beliefs, our consciousness, our patterns of thinking, and our habitual reactions.

 

Life will continue to bring experiences to us. But if we do not transform ourselves inwardly, we will continue falling into the same cycles of suffering again and again.

 

If you enjoy Suzhen Liu’s writings, please check out her latest book, “Discover Love Within—Release your suffering,” available on Amazon.

https://www.amazon.com/Discover-Love-Within-Release-Suffering/dp/0999251732