Let body, mind and world talk to you

 They say a broken clock is right twice a day. There is actually a lot of wisdom in this strange statement. No matter how messed up our life is, there are always these moments of clarity when we understand everything, but soon enough the fog sets in and we continue to be as confused as ever. It’s not surprising actually. We all have a God-link implanted in us, and the more we deviate from our Home, the louder the calls to return to wholeness, serenity and love.

What can we do when we are fed up with our obstacles and self-imposed interferences? We can observe! We can look for the messages our body sends. We can watch our mind in action. We can study our implicit belief system, and we can watch the eternal emotional ups and downs. Life is a feedback mechanism. It displays to us who we think we are. Do you like what you see? Just observe and let body, mind and world talk to you. 

Finding Our Own Power

 Many people live in a victim mindset. They believe others should be responsible for their pain and problems. By blaming others, they feel they have no choice — as if life is simply happening to them. Few are willing to see that they may be co-creating the very situations they complain about. When we begin to observe ourselves, something shifts. We can start to inquire: “How have I been participating in this? In what way have I been helping this pattern to continue?”

 

What others do is not separate from us. Sometimes their behavior is closely related to our own unconscious cooperation. Imagine someone borrows money from you. The first time, he asks for one hundred. You give it to him. He doesn’t return it. The second time, he borrows five hundred. You give it again — and still don’t ask for it back. Later, he asks for thirty thousand. You give it. Finally, he asks for one million — and once again, he doesn’t repay you. Now you feel cheated. You feel betrayed. You feel you have suffered a huge loss.

 

But if we are practicing meditation or self-awareness, we must return to ourselves and ask a deeper question:

 

Why couldn’t I say no?

Was I feeling guilty? Was I afraid of losing the friendship? Was I seeking approval?

In what way was I helping him? How did I become an accomplice in my own hurt?

 

When I lent him the money, what was I hoping to receive in return? Perhaps I wanted to feel needed. Perhaps I wanted security in the relationship. Perhaps I believed that by giving, I could prevent abandonment. Beneath it all, there may have been one simple truth:

I was afraid of losing him.

 

If that is the case, then when he borrowed money and failed to return it, he was not the only one creating the pain. I was participating — because my fear would not allow me to set a boundary. This is not merely about deciding, “I will never lend him money again.” It is about turning inward and facing the deeper fear of loss.

When we allow the fear of losing someone to surface, other fears may rise as well. If we continue to avoid them, the pattern will repeat — and the next time he asks for money, we may give again.

But if we stay present and see clearly that this fear is not an absolute truth — that it is a conditioned illusion — then something changes. We can let the fear come forward. We can feel the pain we once tried to avoid. We can admit honestly: “Yes, I am afraid of losing him.”

 

Paradoxically, when we stop running from the fear, it begins to loosen. The knot softens.

We transcend not because the situation disappears, but because we are no longer controlled by fear. When fear dissolves, the pattern dissolves with it. True power is not found in controlling others. It is found in seeing our own participation — and choosing differently. That is where freedom begins.

 

By Suzhen Liu

 

If you enjoy Suzhen Liu’s writings, please check out her new book, “Discover Love Within—Release Your Suffering” available on Amazon.

 

https://www.amazon.com/Discover-Love-Within-Release-Suffering/dp/0999251732

Being and doing

 The difference between being and doing is neurological in nature. In being our mind is still but vibrant and whatever parts of our neurological networks that needs activating does so on command. The network is not in the driving seat, our downloads are. The universal energy manifests life as is and we are the medium.

In doing, we can differentiate between learning and productive doing on the one hand, and venting our personal longings, fears and drives on the other. In learning and productive problem solving, new neurological links arise, whereas in venting old pathways get cemented while neglecting other healthy connections.

What we call ego is a perspective. It zooms into what is perceived as useful and pleasurable while shutting out the stuff we fear or want to avoid. Our neurological network gets re-wired and downsized according to our narrow-minded seeing and believing. Have the guts to stay with the unpleasantness and question all clinging.

Being alternates with doing but not not everyone is alert to the health and welfare benefits of being. Our neural network heals in being. Actually, all three states advance us in our quest for wholeness, mindfulness and love. We can’t be apart from being for long so that persistent venting is also bound to lead to spiritual insights. 

The Moment Destiny Begins to Soften

 I began learning about family constellation work around 2003. Later, I had the great fortune to study directly with the German therapist and founder of Family Constellations, Bert Hellinger. From the beginning, I was deeply drawn to this mysterious and powerful force. Yet I often felt as though I was standing outside the door, unable to fully enter its essence. What I learned seemed to remain at the surface. Although I could facilitate constellations and clients often experienced remarkable shifts, I did not yet clearly understand how family energy truly operates.

 

 

It was during the pandemic, when I had the opportunity to study more deeply with Teacher Suzhen Liu, that my understanding became grounded and clear. I began to directly experience how family energy can profoundly shift a person’s destiny.

 

 

 

Family energy can change destiny because it is a system. Family members are like ingredients in a pot of soup—each one affects the flavor of the whole. Every experience within the family, especially unacknowledged trauma, influences the entire field. Yet we often remain unaware of how this energy shapes our lives. Without realizing it, we follow inherited patterns, living out movements that are not entirely our own.

 

 

 

Through deeper study, I came to understand that when tragedies occur within a family—suicide, murder, serious accidents, children being given away, or early death—these are not only personal tragedies but systemic shocks. If no one knows how to face and integrate such trauma, it remains suspended within the family field, waiting for someone in a later generation to acknowledge and transform it.

 

 

 

If it remains unaddressed, this energy continues to influence every family member. This may explain why some people carry an inexplicable sadness or heaviness, even when their own lives seem stable.

 

 

 

Just as individuals repeat unresolved patterns, families do the same. Every family has experienced death. When death and grief are not properly faced or integrated, a weight settles into the system. Sometimes tragedies repeat in later generations, such as suicide or fatal accidents.

 

 

 

This is why learning to work with family energy is essential. If we do not clear and transform these accumulated energies, they continue to guide our lives unconsciously. Only when unfinished energies are acknowledged and integrated can we soften the inherited path of destiny—and begin to live a life that truly belongs to us.

 

By Suzanne Yang

Seeing the GO(o)D in others

 Everyone is God speaking.

Why not be polite and listen.

Hafez

We fall in love with potential! Parents see God in their children just as lovers discover divinity in each other. 

With Awakening some walls of separation come down, but in most cases, some work remains to be done. Sometimes we see the GOoD in others. Sometimes we carry GOoDness in our heart, and sometimes we aspire to do GOoD despite ourselves. The journey is not finished until both heart and mind are open and innocence prevails. Until then, the interference shows us the work that remains to be done. A Course in Miracles states, “The partly innocent are apt to be quite stupid at times.” So let’s keep learning in between the being. Life shows us our healing opportunities.

Motivation is the outcome

Without awareness, we continue living under the influence of our belief system.

 

When we were children, we worked hard to meet our parents’ expectations and demands. We believed that if we followed their instructions, they would become happy. But even when we tried our best, they were not necessarily happy. At the same time, our parents were also busy meeting other people’s expectations. In the process, many of them lost touch with themselves. And people who have lost themselves cannot truly be happy.

 

We learn very early to meet others’ demands so they will be pleased with us, accept us, and love us. Once this pattern is formed, it becomes difficult for us to be happy. Our attention constantly goes outward—we watch other people’s reactions and worry whether we are doing well enough.

 

Without awareness, we remain stuck in this pattern. It feels familiar, and we are drawn to it instinctively, just as ants are drawn to sweets. We cannot help returning to it. There is a strong pulling force in this pattern, and without learning and reflection, it is very difficult to step out of it. So we remain caught in this cycle of suffering.

 

Our motivation is our intention, and our intention shapes the outcome. In that sense, motivation is the outcome.

 

A child’s motivation is simple: to make their parents happy in order to receive care and love. The child believes that if the parents are happy, love will follow. So the child studies hard, helps with chores, and obeys instructions.

 

But if the parents are still unhappy and do not offer attention or affection, the child begins to feel unloved and undervalued. Frustration slowly grows.

 

We believe that if we fulfill others’ expectations, they will be happy. And when they are happy, we will finally be happy too. This belief is passed down from generation to generation. We hand over our right to happiness to others and wait for the day when “if they are happy, we will be happy,” but that day never comes.

 

So what is wrong with the thought, “If they are happy, we will be happy”? The issue is not whether this pattern is good or bad. The real issue is that we believe it is true. We do not see that it is only a thought. Our mind cannot recognize that it may be an illusion—something we constructed ourselves.

 

Perhaps it is not created by us alone, but by the whole society. Yet we rarely question it.

And that is where we remain trapped.

 

By Suzhen Liu

 

 

If you enjoy Suzhen Liu’s writings, please check out her new book, “Discover Love Within—Release Your Suffering” available on Amazon.

https://www.amazon.com/Discover-Love-Within-Release-Suffering/dp/0999251732

Being and doing

 The difference between being and doing is neurological in nature. In being our mind is still but vibrant and whatever parts of our neurological networks that needs activating does so on command. The network is not in the driving seat, our downloads are. The universal energy manifests life as is and we are the medium.

In doing, we can differentiate between learning and productive doing on the one hand, and venting our personal longings, fears and drives on the other. In learning and productive problem solving, new neurological links arise, whereas in venting old pathways get cemented while neglecting other healthy connections.

What we call ego is a vision. It zooms into what is perceived as useful and pleasurable while shutting out the stuff we fear or want to avoid. Our neurological network gets re-wired and downsized according to our narrow-minded seeing and believing. Have the guts to stay with the unpleasantness and question all clinging.

Being alternates with doing but not not everyone is alert to the health and welfare benefits of being. Our neural network heals in being. Actually, all three states advance us in our quest for wholeness, mindfulness and love. We can’t be apart from being for long so that persistent venting is also bound to lead to spiritual insights.