To Clean is to See

 When we feel deeply lost, cleaning can help us return to a clear mind. The purpose of cleaning is not to get rid of our problem—nor to change how others treat us—the key is to see that everything happening in our lives follows a self-fulfilling pattern, and through seeing, we come back to clarity.

 

Cleaning is about seeing our obstacles, not eliminating them. When we can see our obstacles, we are no longer lost. Because once we see them, we recognize that they are our own inner issues, and we understand that the work must be done within.

 

If we cannot see this, we remain lost and keep searching outside ourselves—looking for a better teacher, a more famous master, a more powerful guru, or the highest dharma. Yet no one can transcend our obstacles for us. No one knows what we are thinking from moment to moment. Only we know, and only we can do this work for ourselves. If we do not understand this, we will continue to seek answers outside.

 

Before a clear mind can arise, there is one essential condition: we must be willing to face ourselves. Some people are not willing. Whenever they encounter their obstacles, they interpret them as proof that they are not good enough or not perfect, and they want to escape these feelings rather than face their own pain.

 

It takes great dedication and sincerity to keep diving inward, day and night, to see our obstacles. When we continuously pay attention to ourselves, clarity naturally emerges. Let me share an example from a student:

 

“I used to complain that my husband came home late after work. To make him come home earlier, I tried every possible way—even offering to pick him up. In the end, I was exhausted, and nothing changed.

 

One day, during meditation, I looked deeply into why I was so obsessed with what time he came home. To my surprise, I discovered that in my heart, I didn’t actually want him to come home early. I was afraid that if he did, he might look for trouble with me.

 

When I was seventeen, I once went out with friends. My boyfriend at the time got drunk and jealous, got into a fight, and hurt his thumb. Later in my life, my ex-husband got drunk and put a knife to my neck. On a subconscious level, I carried a fear that drunken people would hurt me, and I projected this unresolved pain onto my husband.

 

Through practicing letting go and staying present with these old injuries, the inner knots gradually loosened. After I faced them, saw them clearly, and understood their roots, my fear dissolved. I no longer worried about my husband coming home drunk. Naturally, he began coming home on time, and he also stopped drinking so much.”

 

When issues arise and we are willing to face them, harmony emerges in our lives and relationships. When relationships become harmonious, stability and wisdom naturally follow.

 

By Suzhen Liu

 

If you enjoy Suzhen Liu’s writings, please check out her new book, “Discover Love Within—Release Your Suffering” available on Amazon.

https://www.amazon.com/Discover-Love-Within-Release-Suffering/dp/0999251732

Surrender: when four become One (video)

 Sadhguru tells a beautiful story of four practitioners of meditation, energy yoga, love and the flow are forced to merge into One by surrendering to the elements. Practice the favorite spiritual technique as you see fit but understand that the last step is an act of surrendering and grasping that everything we ever wanted is here and now.

https://youtu.be/zP8NEUC8v8k?si=RqTlvm4fVPkyajoT

A Clear Mind

 I observe that there are two kinds of people when they encounter difficulties. One is the lost person. When facing hardship, they do not know how to process what is happening or how to move forward. A clear trait of this state is blame “It’s all your fault.” “Why do you treat me like this?” “You hurt me—this is your issue.” “If only you treated me better, I would be happy.” “If you earned more, I could have a better life.” This is how a lost person reacts. When difficulty arises, their first impulse is to escape. They experience much pain and suffering, and eventually they give up, unwilling to take responsibility.

 

It is important to recognize the state of being lost. When we are lost, we spend our energy trying to change others, seeking recognition and validation. In the end, we fail and exhaust our life force, because we have been walking in the wrong direction from the very beginning.

 

Returning to the earlier example of the mother and daughter—what is the root cause of their suffering? Is it not their interpretations, thoughts, expectations, beliefs, and wishes that create a self-fulfilling world? From pain, we create problems.

 

If we do not attempt to understand our pain from within, we cannot be liberated from suffering.

The second type of person is one with clarity. When an issue arises, they turn back toward themselves, because they understand there is only one true direction—the mind. As we learn, it is the mind that determines the path we take.

 

Most of our emotions and behaviors function under the influence of collective karma. These patterns may come from our mother’s suffering, or from our grandparents. Once influenced, we repeat the same patterns, relive the same destinies, and slowly become lost, eventually losing hope. This is why we must look inward—not at what the external world gives us, but at what is happening inside. In this inward journey, courage and passion naturally emerge.

 

It is not easy to live with clarity, because we are surrounded by lost people. We are influenced by our parents, our spouse, and our friends. Once influenced, our reactions fall into repetitive patterns. This is why awareness of the mind is essential. Only through awareness can we free ourselves from becoming lost.

 

Even so, freeing ourselves from these influences is not easy. In moments like this, it becomes especially important to cleanse and realign ourselves.

 

By Suzhen Liu

If you enjoy Suzhen Liu’s writings, please check out her new book, “Discover Love Within—Release Your Suffering” available on Amazon.

 https://www.amazon.com/Discover-Love-Within-Release-Suffering/dp/0999251732

Planting the acorn

 The acorn theory was proposed by James Hillman, suggesting each of us has a calling we need to fulfill. Turn towards what needs to get done, and turn away from what wastes your talents, and let life do the rest.

Just like an acorn already contains a massive tree—absent of the 100 years it takes to bring it to fruition, we already carry abundance inside. God takes care of Her creations, all we have to do is to realize our perfection.

Thorough Self-Understanding

 A mother hurts her daughter because of her expectations. She wishes her daughter to be capable. Beneath these expectations lies fear—fear that her daughter is not good enough, and fear that she herself is not a good mother.

 

When the daughter is hurt, she feels abandoned and unrecognized. Beneath these feelings is a fear of not being loved.

 

The mother suffers because of her fear, and the daughter suffers because of her fear. They are suffering from the same fear. The mother expresses her fear by hurting her daughter; the daughter expresses her fear through feelings of abandonment and unlovability after being hurt. Although their expressions look different, the root is the same. These seemingly different fears are, in essence, one. This is why we can call it collective karma.

 

It appears that the mother and daughter are confronting each other, but in reality, the source of their reactions and emotions is the same. Learning to be present with different situations allows us to see that the pain of the mother and the pain of the daughter are not separate. There is no true difference. When this can be seen, the possibility arises for them to bridge the gap between them, and only then can their relationship begin to change.

 

When one can see this clearly, we can say there is thorough self-understanding. With thorough self-understanding, it becomes possible to understand others as well. When the daughter understands her own pain and her fear of abandonment, she can also understand her mother’s pain, expectations, and fears. She can meet those parts of her mother with understanding.

 

When you have access to self-understanding, it brings tremendous energy. It is a state in which the mind expands. This same understanding can be applied when practicing letting go, or within interpersonal relationships. The reason is the same.

By Suzhen Liu

If you enjoy Suzhen Liu’s writings, please check out her new book, “Discover Love Within—Release Your Suffering” available on Amazon.

https://www.amazon.com/Discover-Love-Within-Release-Suffering/dp/0999251732

Let go and be!

 Compulsive habits are an interesting eye opener. Maybe you have been trying to lose twenty pounds for a few years running; maybe you know that you drink too much, but have a hunch that it will be again one bottle too much on the upcoming weekend; maybe there is that one lover you know is poisonous but you keep returning.

Sure, motivational speaker Tony Robbins may be able to help you unleash the giant within. He has a handsome reward for his teachings—a net worth of 600 million—but I am not so sure that his clients fare as well. The Victorian times demonstrated that man can follow his will, but the Victorian man caused two world wars doing so.

The lesson learned of the compulsive habit is that the “you” is a mistaken concept. The resolution is to let go of will, plan and regret and observe the energies streaming in, replacing the personal restrictions and aspirations. Who needs to swim in a dreamed up infinity pool if the ocean is just around the corner. Let go and be!

Repetitive Injuries

 Imagine this scenario: a daughter is hit by a car and suffers a mild injury. When she goes home, she seeks comfort from her mother. To her shock, not only does her mother fail to comfort her, she scolds her instead: “How useless you are! You’re always creating trouble for me!” The daughter is injured twice—first by the accident, and then by her mother’s words. Imagine how she would feel.

 

Feelings such as fear, being wronged, not being recognized or abandoned leave deep imprints in the mind. Later in life, these imprints are easily reactivated. After marriage, she may have the same emotional reactions when she argues with her husband, and she may even repeat the same scolding patterns with her own children.

 

Most of the time, we no longer remember the details of our original emotional injuries, but the feelings remain. They stay dormant, waiting to be triggered. When a situation even slightly resembles the past, those old emotions rush back to the surface.

 

For example, when she argues with her husband and he says, “Why did you spend two hundred Taiwanese dollars on soy sauce when one hundred would have been enough?” she may immediately feel wronged, misunderstood, and not recognized. Is this really about soy sauce? Please pause and notice this carefully.

 

When we seek counseling for conflicts with our spouse, we often believe the problem is about such surface issues. But how can we clearly sense the original injury beneath them? Most of the time, we cannot. Even though we may have forgotten the events, the emotional wounds—fear, abandonment, not being understood or recognized—are still there. They continue to be triggered whenever similar situations arise.

 

So what should we do with these feelings? How can we face them? Our first instinct is usually to escape when these emotions surface. We may distract ourselves, slack off, or seek pleasure to avoid the pain. As a result, the pattern remains unresolved. Instead, we can choose to return and stay with the pain. When we sense feelings such as being misunderstood, we can pause and remain present with this painful energy. When the pain receives our full attention, it begins to heal itself.

 

During the healing process, you may cry, scream, or feel anger. These are surface expressions of energy. Please continue to remain with the deeper pain beneath them. When this energy passes, it begins to transform.

 

What does it transform into? When you stay present with the feeling of not being understood, you may begin to sense deeper layers—fear and loneliness. At that moment, the emotions of being abandoned or misunderstood naturally begin to collapse. This transformation happens on its own, beyond the mind’s predictions.

 

If we go even deeper, we may see that the original injury was rooted in loneliness and fear. If there was no fear, the daughter might have been able to say to her mother, “I was hit by a car, and you scolded me?” But because of fear, she did not dare to express herself. She was afraid of being abandoned or unloved. That fear silenced her.

 

When we can remain fully present with the feelings of not being understood and abandoned, and allow our awareness to go deeper, we come into direct contact with fear itself. At that moment, we can clearly see the repetitive patterns in our relationships. This is pure attention.

 

Let’s return to the original scenario. Why did the mother scold her daughter? Because she had expectations, and her daughter did not meet them. Disappointment turned into anger. These expectations were formed from the mother’s own past wounds—experiences she did not want to relive. At the root of her reaction was fear.

 

If we do not understand our own fear, we will repeat the same reactions when life presents challenges. In fact, the mother is trapped in her own pattern of suffering. If she cannot observe and bring awareness to it, the pattern will not end. Instead, it will be passed on to the next generation through her daughter.

By Suzhen Liu

If you enjoy Suzhen Liu’s writings, please check out her new book, “Discover Love Within—Release Your Suffering” available on Amazon.

https://www.amazon.com/Discover-Love-Within-Release-Suffering/dp/0999251732