With the help of meditation, I slowly discover how often I am under my mind’s influence and not living in the present. It always feels gray, with lots going on. It is as if lots of noise happens in the background. It’s really a feeling like dreaming or watching an internal movie. It’s like I am in a state of trance.
These days I am able to catch it when my mind starts making up stories or jumps to conclusions. I can also increasingly catch it when I am identifying myself with these stories and conclusions. This observation by itself is very liberating!
My mind makes conclusions and provides its own interpretation and then induces me to take action accordingly. When I take these conclusions as the gospel and follow them accordingly, I often discover that I am struggling afterwards and find myself in conflicts. I realized that they are just stories and just opinions.
When I take action according to the truth, it feels like riding waves instead. Unfortunately, my mind intervenes quite often with the truth. When mind intervenes with the truth, I can always feel pain and struggles. When I let go of that mind control, I can always feel joy and liveliness arising in me.
If I want to have a joyful and lively life, it’s essential to follow the truth. Only the truth connects us with our source and real energy! I can always feel lively energy when I step out of mind and connect with the present moment. When I am in the present, I can hear different sounds in my background; I can feel the sensation in my body; I can smell the fragrance in the air. The world is colorful and lively!
So I am learning to live a life in the present and step out the world made up by mind. When I step out of the world made by mind, I feel like I am walking into the unknown. Life suddenly becomes a mystery to me and I am just staying curious! Curious about what is going to unfold through me!
What an adventure! Will you join me?
By Suzanne Yang
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