Ten years to authenticity

Can you remember the day when your awakening journey started? I can’t. It was definitely a process of first spiritual glimpses that seemed a bit confusing. The one encounter I remember like it was yesterday was me sitting in a conference room of financial experts discussing the beginning of the end of the world. That must have been some 6 months before the global financial crisis hit in 2008. During that meeting I felt a kundalini energy rising up my spine which was simply out of the world. Ten years later I have experienced a thing or two about but the spiritual awakening process but still would call myself ‘awakening’ rather than ‘enlightened’.

Ask spiritual folks who have been on this journey for a long time and they will give you one characteristic of the state that they are in, peace of mind! They have reached a new equilibrium that often looks drastically different compared to the life they lived before their awakening. I meet few people who would classify themselves ‘enlightened’, though in my eyes they often are. I certainly wouldn’t call myself ‘enlightened’, but I will call myself ‘authentic’. I have reached a new equilibrium with new friends, a new profession and a new perspective of the world. Otherwise, for those who know little about my transformation, I am still exactly the same person they know from ten years ago. Awakening is strange that way.

There is a process to awakening. It is fine to be ambitious with your goals, but at the end of the day you also have to acknowledge what truly happens in your life, not just what you want to it be. Enlightenment, authenticity and peace of mind come and go along this path like clouds drifting in the wind. The state of enlightenment and peace of mind is up to the Grace of God, but authenticity is your accomplishment. When you are struggle it may mean that you are aiming too high. Let God decide how your new world will look like instead. I have now reached the stage that Eckhart Tolle described in one of his books as the swan drifting on the lake. He looks beautiful to the onlooker but no one sees that the paddling beneath the surface is less elegant. It’s quite alright though. I have reached my goal ten years into the Awakening journey, what you see is genuine.