Sex can be the ego's willing soldier. I have already written a note on this subject (The Battle of the Bodies, 5/27/08), but I thought I could add a few thoughts. I am currently reading Soul Psychology from Joshua David Stone, and he has an interesting chapter on this fascinating subject. He writes that each time you sleep with others, you automatically become connected with these people. You will feel their ups and downs in life, and they will feel yours. Wow, sex education should include this insight! He also states that if you cheat on your spouse, automatically all three parties become connected. I have never heard this before, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was true.
When I first heard Jesus' claim "When you only look at a woman with lust, you have already committed adultery", I asked myself, how can this be? Now, as I have evolved spiritually, I know how damaging thoughts, intentions, fantasies can be to other people. Do you realize that you are polluting the universe and hurting others when you have sexual fantasies, when you are playing violent video games, and even when you watch "Law and Order - Special Victim Unit".
In my last blog on this subject, I linked sex and sin, and really struggled with it because I know deep down inside that sin is only a concept the mind. Nevertheless, I believe that the ego can use sex as a powerful weapon to control you, to attack other bodies and let yourself be attacked. Afterwards the ego presents the sexual experience and argues that you sinned and consequently need to be punished. Just think of AIDS, this terrible disease is transmitted sexually. As a disease is mostly a concept of the mind, the ego is telling you that you deserve to die in this horrible way because you have sinned.
Me personally, I have never cheated -physically- on anybody, but only thanks to my True Self. I did struggle with sexual fantasies in the past. Actually, initially I did not perceive them as a problem. If you exchange sexual fantasies with like-minded adults on the internet, is there anything wrong with that? Well, sure! The ego loves sexual fantasies and takes you on his joy-ride. You can oberserve this for yourself, just see how different sexual fantasies are from having sex with your partner. When my spiritual journey took off, I was told in not-so-subtle images that it is time to stop with the sex stuff once and foreall. The spiritual journey is an ongoing conscious choice, and this one is a pretty clear one.
I exchanged sexual fantasies with people over the internet, so the internet should also be a perfect medium to apologize to all those whose lives I have affected with my fantasies and whose bodies I have mentally attacked. I have forgiven myself, I hope you do too. To end this note on a positive note, just think how much power and positive influence we can have on others if we banish the ego, bit, by bit, out of out lives. I am exited about the tremendous opportunity to raise others spiritually with my thoughts, my actions and with my ongoing efforts to discover my True Self. My previous struggle with sex shows that it can be done. You can banish the ego out of your system: Get thee behind me ego, my True Self has nothing to do with you!