Finding Your True Self

Hope and fear are both phantoms

that arise from thinking of the self.

When we don’t see the self as self,

What do we have to fear?

See the world as your self.

Have faith in the way things are.

Love the world as your self;

Then you can care for all things.

(Tao Te Ching)

 There are so many things that we identify with, our body, something our parents may have said about us when we were young, our perceived attractiveness or lack thereof, our role as parents or children, our social status or profession, the emotions that come and go, the endless chatter in our head, and so much more. All these identifications will change as life goes by. The young beautiful girl will eventually become old and lose her physical attractiveness. The powerful manager will one day be over the hill. Your status will vanish when you get fired or someone else becomes the new hot shot in your company or your community. You work hard to keep your position, but the fear that you one day might lose it all will remain. People with low confidence and perceived weaknesses might fall into the trap that their lack of confidence makes the negative outcome self-fulfilling. They might keep looking for evidence to prove that they are victims of life, or they might with hard work and the help of positive psychology turn their life around. But all along everyone identifies with some role, be it that of a loser or a rising star.

Sooner or later every role will be transformed. While the mother will always identify with her role, it will still be hard for her to accept when her children grow up and move out. All ego roles are fleeting in nature and we are here to learn that we are not any of that. We  are not our changing emotions, no matter  whether it is happiness or sadness, whether it is exuberance or depression. We are  neither child, nor an adult, nor a granny. We are not our thoughts, not our fantasies or desires. You may ask, so who exactly are we? In meditation you get a glimpse of who you truly are. When the thoughts come to a standstill we can liberate ourselves from all the mind prison and merge with the Source.  At this blissful moment we get a taste for who we truly are.

 We can be in touch with our Self always, even when we are at the peak of our performance. The Tao reminds us moment by moment of who we truly are. When we identify with something we put blinders on and see life from a particular point of view. Let life – the Tao – take these blinders away. Let's open up to every moment, welcome change, embrace our adversaries as much as our friends. Everyone and everything is just our Self reminding us of who we truly are.

As you open up to life without hesitation you can find that you will never be over the hill, all you ever encounter is beauty, peace, joy and love.

By Christian and Su Zhen