Love Yourself and Love Your Neighbor

Any self-judgment and self-attack is harmful, yet often these mental processes are so subtle that we often don't even realize them when they happen. Whenever you have these negative self-dialogues, we will also find negative feed-back loops that suddenly become very real. We undermine our own actions, we project negativity and defensiveness and people react to us accordingly. Negative self-judgments translate into negative results and down we go in a vicious cycle. This negative loop becomes so overwhelming that we at one point even start to discount our positive points.

This kind of self-judgment is poisonous.Try to observe your own internal dialogues and see how these negative biases start to infiltrate your actions and behaviors. We are who we think we are, so whenever you judge or attack yourself you literally undermine yourself. Simon Cowell in an American Idol show once told a contestant, "If you don't believe in yourself, no one else will." This sounds harsh, but unfortunately it is very true. Your environment mirrors your internal frame of mind back to you. Start with a positive frame of mind and you will like what you see.

The spiritual community demands kindness and consideration towards others, but this is impossible unless you are kind to yourself. The Tao can help you to be kind to everyone. A spiritual path teaches you the awareness to monitor your inner dialogue and assess how you interact with your environment. A path also shows you that we are all the same. As you mellow down inside, see how your assessment of the world brightens up with it. Similarly, as you understand that the people who surround you are just as human as you are, see how it becomes so much easier for you to forgive others and yourself. They often say that a perfect indicator of spiritual maturity is your ability to laugh. It is true, walk the Way and find out that I am you and you are me. What is there to mind? Along the Way you realize that situations that used to be complex, conflicted and stressful, become simple, easy to deal with, and often simply funny. As you let down your guard, see that the whole universe starts cooperating with you. Your heart suddenly feels light, cheerful and is full of love.

By Christian and Su Zhen