I Am Whole

No tree, it is said, can grow to heaven unless its roots reach down to hell.
(C. G. Jung)

My astrologer told me that between March 2017 and March 2019 my shadow side would pop back up to the surface which surprised me given that I had thought I had outgrown that stuff a long time ago. The way she described it was, "nothing serious, just be mindful that in that period the one glass of wine can easily become three." Well, the other day as I was driving home I felt incredible anger: anger at the people who clash with me at work and anger at the situation I am in. It was then when I understood that the so-called dark side is always within me just like laver always bubbles beneath the earth crust. It is ok when it erupts in the occasional volcanic explosion. It is just a pressure outlet, what is not ok is to focus my energy on it as I did in the past.

I understand very well why this period re-connects me with the demons of the past. I currently have to fight for my professional survival, being surrounded by people who want to have their share of a shrinking pie. It is a time of professional growing up for me personally: a time for assertion, a time for focused work and targeted communication, and a time to learn how to let the magic of the WAY flow through me. So what if I am not exactly where I could be. So what if demons pop up at time when the stress gets to me. I appreciate who I am today. I am proud of the package deal so to speak. Demons no longer can suck the energy out of me, and I no longer condemn them in return. My demons in the past got created because I suppressed my aggressiveness in the name of spirituality. Today I can enjoy the best of all worlds, being a messenger of the WAY, being kind and generous to my environment while using the manly assertiveness, drive and focus whenever the WAY requires it. Today I am whole.