My wife gets her share of my attention, as do our boys. My spiritual partner gets her time, just as all the spiritual folks who reach out to me. The stranger on the street, the business relationship, as well as the many faces that show up in my life. The energy of the exchange dictates the intensity. There is small talk in supposedly important interactions, just as there is incredible depth in supposedly random encounter. Only GOD knows what may happen in the next moment. I don’t.
Life has an energy that I follow. I know an ‘I AM THAT I AM’ moment, just as I recognize an ego trip. All experiences are part of life. The self sometimes pretends to be the SELF, just as the SELF occasionally hides in the supposed banality of life. When people ask me “Are you on an Awakening journey?”, I give a resounding yes because I remember that in comparison to this journey’s light my past was a dark alley. Today I am on autopilot of sorts, whereas before I thought I was in charge.
When people ask me, “Are you enlightened?”, I embarrassingly shake my head. Too often my self takes me to the cleaners, and too often I come home shaking even though I know that I did the Way’s work. Still, I am a master at bringing a smile on people’s faces. I excel at making people connect with what is truly meaningful to them. It is a GOD chosen crowd though. Life lines us up day by day to connect the SELF in both of us, while demonstrating—to me at least—what the self is still clinging to.
Yes, I am a soldier of GOD with a drive and grit that is second to none. Yet, I have seen men better than me falter. What truly makes me special is knowing the role that my support system plays in keeping me sane and in recharging my energy. I also know that this journey is not about me; it is about seeing life the way a lover or an artist does. It is about energy, love and GOD finding. In short, it is the WAY. Sometimes I wonder whether I truly exist. Life is the WAY. We are the WAY. I follow the WAY.