We all want others to love and treat us as we feel we deserve. We feel safe when others love us as we expect it. As a matter of fact, we want to feel secure. Have you ever observed that if the loved ones are around, you won’t miss them? You only miss them when they are not around, or if they don’t talk to you. What we really care about is people talking to us and loving us, but not about learning. Yet, that’s what relationships are for. You cannot solve the issues related to your state of mind and your relationships unless you learn about them. You can only know your obstacles by learning how to stop them.
You need to have the attitude to pay attention and observe yourself. If you don’t pay attention and observe, you will fall back to your old status and take the same strategy to deal with issues. Yet, they all failed.
For example, we may have multiple way to deal with our problems, and some may work already. Yet, there are still some approaches we don’t yet know about and they will emerge slowly. When they surface, your response is key. When you are in a status of indulgence, what are your thoughts, emotions, reactions, and how do you treat your family and loved ones then? What do you say? When you pay attention to these issues, your energy will become strong, and then you will be getting to the root cause. Also in the process, you are trying to understand your own position.
If you don’t understand yourself, it is impossible to be free because you don’t know what you are doing, so how can you be free and at ease? So it is very important to know yourself. All the root cause starts over there.
If you find Suzhen Liu’s writings helpful, please check out her book, ‘Letting Go—Release Your Suffering’ on Amazon. The book is a joint project. Suzanne Yang translated it from the original Chinese Publication into English and we published it with Balboa Press.
https://www.amazon.com/Letting-Go-Release-Your-Suffering/dp/1982258004
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