Student: Even though I’ve made up my mind to learn, I’m still often lazy. Even if I can steal just one minute to idle, I will indulge, and when I do nothing all day, at night a thought arises: “I wasted the whole day. I shouldn’t waste tomorrow.”
Suzhen Liu:
In meditation practice, you slowly observe—and it is like passing through one gate after another. Each gate you break through is the accumulation of energy that no longer resists. This is not forcing or persuading, it must unfold naturally. If you force it, you return to the starting point.
This is the skill of meditation, and it requires a process. We keep trying to reassure ourselves because our hearts cannot settle in any state at all. We constantly search for a feeling of safety. All of this must be learned. There must be a process of understanding our own obstacles; without going through this, there will be no real stability.
The habit of asking, “What am I going to do next?” is simply our way of seeking reassurance. Once our plan or structure stops and that reassurance disappears, we become restless and uneasy. We don’t even know this is happening—so we keep doing things to fill the space.
For the heart to settle, we must move through these layers and understand these internal obstacles. Then the impulse of “I must make myself feel stable” loses its foundation. These obstacles are complex and numerous. We spend a lifetime soothing them, yet still feel empty, unfulfilled, and cornered, and the more we soothe them, the more demanding they become. It becomes harder and harder to satisfy them.
When we finally allow everything to drop, what lies beneath will begin to surface. If we can continue with meditation practice, we can move forward step by step. We often find meditation dull or boring because the “self” craves new stimulation—this too is connected to the sense of safety. After some time, when meditation feels “not fresh” or “not fun,” laziness appears.
But the attitude, effort, and time you invest in meditation will never be wasted. Compared to the joy of the ordinary world, meditative stillness is the elephant; worldly pleasures are the ants.
We pursue reassurance—we love that feeling. Human beings have passed down this tendency since ancient times. When we arrive in this world, we naturally receive these patterns. Human beings have always existed in this mode.
When the mind becomes quiet, it can merge with what you are observing—whatever challenge or state you are facing now. That feeling is indescribable. It arises naturally as you continue walking the path of meditation.
By Suzhen Liu
No comments:
Post a Comment