I observe that there are two kinds of people when they encounter difficulties. One is the lost person. When facing hardship, they do not know how to process what is happening or how to move forward. A clear trait of this state is blame “It’s all your fault.” “Why do you treat me like this?” “You hurt me—this is your issue.” “If only you treated me better, I would be happy.” “If you earned more, I could have a better life.” This is how a lost person reacts. When difficulty arises, their first impulse is to escape. They experience much pain and suffering, and eventually they give up, unwilling to take responsibility.
It is important to recognize the state of being lost. When we are lost, we spend our energy trying to change others, seeking recognition and validation. In the end, we fail and exhaust our life force, because we have been walking in the wrong direction from the very beginning.
Returning to the earlier example of the mother and daughter—what is the root cause of their suffering? Is it not their interpretations, thoughts, expectations, beliefs, and wishes that create a self-fulfilling world? From pain, we create problems.
If we do not attempt to understand our pain from within, we cannot be liberated from suffering.
The second type of person is one with clarity. When an issue arises, they turn back toward themselves, because they understand there is only one true direction—the mind. As we learn, it is the mind that determines the path we take.
Most of our emotions and behaviors function under the influence of collective karma. These patterns may come from our mother’s suffering, or from our grandparents. Once influenced, we repeat the same patterns, relive the same destinies, and slowly become lost, eventually losing hope. This is why we must look inward—not at what the external world gives us, but at what is happening inside. In this inward journey, courage and passion naturally emerge.
It is not easy to live with clarity, because we are surrounded by lost people. We are influenced by our parents, our spouse, and our friends. Once influenced, our reactions fall into repetitive patterns. This is why awareness of the mind is essential. Only through awareness can we free ourselves from becoming lost.
Even so, freeing ourselves from these influences is not easy. In moments like this, it becomes especially important to cleanse and realign ourselves.
By Suzhen Liu
If you enjoy Suzhen Liu’s writings, please check out her new book, “Discover Love Within—Release Your Suffering” available on Amazon.
https://www.amazon.com/Discover-Love-Within-Release-Suffering/dp/0999251732
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