When the issue is truly understood, the pain begins to dissolve on its own. When you sincerely try to understand your pain, it opens its door to you. To come into contact with pain, we must open our hearts and look honestly at our patterns, attitudes, and beliefs. The moment we are willing to see clearly, the pain begins to move and transform.
For example, there was a student who had been ill for a long time. Even after seeing doctors and attending counseling, she still could not recover. Eventually, she came to me for a family energy session. During the session, it became clear that there was a voice within her saying that she did not want to get well. When such a belief exists in the unconscious mind, naturally, many helpful suggestions and opportunities for healing are pushed away.
Why would someone not want to recover? Perhaps because illness brings love, care, and attention. Many of us have had similar experiences in childhood. When we caught a cold, we did not need to go to school, we could sleep in, our mother might cook rice porridge for us, our father might come home earlier, and perhaps we would even receive extra care and comfort.
So there may be hidden benefits in remaining unwell. But this truth cannot be forced upon someone; she must discover it for herself and be honest enough to admit it. On one side, she kept searching for healing by seeing doctors, while on the other side, a part of her did not want to recover. Perhaps one day, when she becomes tired of the inner conflict and finally admits, “Actually, a part of me does not want to get well,” that very moment may become the beginning of true transformation. From there, growth, healing, and inner awakening can begin.
In truth, these wounds are only energy. We are afraid to face them because we resist what we feel. Yet when we dare to look directly at the cloud, it often begins to change and even disappear. The key is simply to admit what is there, be honest, and remain present with it.
The discomfort we feel in the beginning can gradually transform into clarity and silence when we stay present with it. Perhaps you have never experienced this before. In reality, discomfort, silence, and clarity are not separate—they are deeply connected. At first, the process can feel very difficult, but once the energy has finished moving through us, we may suddenly feel that life is meaningful, extraordinary, and worthwhile.
Everyone feels that their pain is immense, as though they are the person suffering the most in the world. Yet often, what truly happens is that we spend our lives escaping pain because we are afraid to remain with it. If we can learn to stay present with our pain and understand the energy within it, it can offer profound insight into our lives and relationships. Then we may discover that there is a vast space, compassion, and love already living within us.
By Suzhen Liu
If you enjoy Suzhen Liu’s writings, please check out her latest book, “Discover Love Within—Release your suffering,” available on Amazon
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