Creative Tensions

The tension is unbearable. I hope it lasts.
(Oscar Wilde)

 I can tell you something about the creative tension that Oscar Wilde refers to. I work as a strategist in the financial industry and it is part of my job description to make predictions about events whose outcomes are unknown. The tension when you make a forecast is unbearable. Your mind searches intensely during these periods for clues, but fact of the matter is that at the time when you make your predictions you just don't know what will happen. What you do know, however, is that every voice you meet is important.  You have learned over and over again that there is no hierarchy, every hint, loud or quiet, matters. So be grateful for the golden opportunity that comes your way when you bump into people today; everyone has a present in hand for you.

The tension has to be there. If you knew everything in advance you would no longer value the input of others as much. You might even look down on the people who have the 'wrong' point of view at that particular juncture. The happiness comes once the tension gets resolved one way or another, so if you want to enjoy the ensuing happiness, you have to bear the tension as well.

So where exactly is the security that many spiritual path travelers report if they are as exposed to uncertainty as everyone else? The security comes from the realization that no matter what happens, the outcome will be spiritual meaningful to you. Sure, there are dark valleys and perhaps even enemies along the way, but as Psalm 23 reminds us, the spiritual path traveler will always be equipped to handle every scary moment just fine. It took me a while to accept the unbearable tension of life, but like Oscar Wilde before me, I now want more of it every day.