On Separation

There is a yin and yang to the Tao, an up and down, a rhythm that underlies everything. Everything moves back and fro. Like in skiing, you have to keep moving to the opposite side to keep moving down-hill and stay balanced. You find the rhythm of life in day and night, birth and death, and in connections as well as in solitude. This rhythm can be long or short. Planets can travels with each other for 3 months or for 30 000 years.

Life comes in cycles, but you tend to prefer one side. If you are male, yin is probably your favorite; we tend to favor spring over winter, birth over death. We all know that it causes pain to move into the opposite direction of life. It is hard for us to just appreciate the rhythm of life and sometimes we are out of tune.

Take relationships for example. We crave connections; to exist we need to give love and receive love, we need to feel appreciated and cared for; we need to listen and to touch. Unfortunately, whether you like it or not, it is very possible that the Tao will take some of these precious connections away from you. Friends may come and they may go, colleagues you care for may be hired and fired, people you love may die. She may take these connections away from you to let you understand that your happiness shouldn't just depend on others; you should be able to be happy even when you are alone.

Separation will make you more mature, more self-sufficient and self-reliant. Go out and gather new nutrients and then come back together and share an enriched life - it is to make your life more colorful and wonderful. It is very much like after the rest of long winter, after the gathering of important nutrients, nature is ready to share its joy by coloring the world with beautiful flowers!

Don't mind the separation with your loved ones. Using this precious time to enrich yourself, and let your dear friend gather his new life perspective, so when you reunite you both feel refreshed and recharged. Your relationship is getting sweeter even in separation very much as as grapes get fermented in order to get the good wine. You enrich each other's life whether you are together or live apart; you become whole together. No matter what happens, the Tao always has good a plan for you. Accept the rhythm of life and embrace whatever comes your way, it is all good.

By Su Zhen