Express Your Shadow

I can be a shy person and sometimes have awkward moments in social settings. Perhaps I wasn't born this way, but since both my parents tended to be quite shy when it came to meeting new people, I simply can't remember that we ever as a family had much interactions with others barring a few family friends.  Still, I had to reinvent myself late in life whether I liked it or not. First my job required it, but much more importantly, the Tao has taught me that each new person I meet with has a treat for me. So I just consciously overwrite my mild social anxiety disorder whenever I need to. Perhaps it will get easier for me in coming decades, perhaps it never will, but that's what I am going to do anyway because the Tao says so and I have learned over and over that you want to do what She recommends.

Dealing with your shadow personality is similar. A character pops out activated by a particular situation and you ask yourself, " Is that really me? No, it can't be." So you try to get rid of it but somehow this disowned personality stays with you and always returns to the surface. Find the root cause of your struggles just as I managed to link my mild social anxiety disorder to my parents' shyness. It is helpful to know where your repressed desires come from, but the next steps in the process have to be to accept them and to do something creative with them.  Unfortunately this is hard to do because our society tends to frown on whatever you classify as a shadow. Listen to the demands of your repressed desires and you will always find some authentic needs buried somewhere. Work on those and express your somewhat distorted preferences  in a spiritually kosher way. But don't just go by the rules of our spiritual community, you define what is kosher and what is not.  Yes it takes a little effort and yes it can be a little uncomfortable, but you can advance so much personally and spiritually when you are able to express your entire personality spectrum.

Who knows what this transformation could be about. Perhaps you can try to become more manly or you could find out that you are gay. Maybe you have to be more straight-forward in business settings or with friends, perhaps the world wants you to let your hair down. You could try to push your sexual boundaries a little or be willing to gossip from time to time just to help a  friend feel included. There is no wrong or right, there is only your way and the Tao will help you find yourself. In all these adjustments you will feel a release of energy over time because that is what the shadow is good for. The shadow is a giant source of energy when channeled in the right direction.

We spiritual travelers are a little different from the ordinary folks. When you are on the path you unfortunately have little choice but to come along. I had no choice but to open up to others whether my shy personality liked it or not. Think of your shadow demands as a little child being dragged along kicking and screaming. Anyone who has ever dealt with little children knows that in the end you have to find a compromise. Father and child both have to get their way otherwise no one will be happy. So look out for your disowned screaming child and take her by the hand. You will find the way that works for both of you. Embrace your shadow and you gonna like the way you turn out, the Tao says so.