As a man's real power grows and his knowledge widens,
ever the way he can follow grows narrower:
until at last he chooses nothing,
but does only and wholly what he must do.
(Ursula K. Le Guin, A Wizard of Earthsea)
What is there to say and what is there to do? You used to do what you did because you had to do what you did. Subconscious programs were running you, as was the magnetism of the world around you. Then came a first glimpse of an awakening and it dawned on you that you have a choice in all this. Exhilaration was sometimes followed by depression; hope was at times a bed-fellow of despair. So you realized that the yin and yang of life isn't you either. You learned to engage with life very much like an experienced surfer handles the waves of the ocean.
The Dance of the Tao is exactly that, the letting go, the submission to a higher Force that knows you a lot better than you yourself. You do this for a few years and will end up, in a weird way, where you started: driven by a Force beyond you and without really having a choice. You become a child again with powers beyond your understanding. It is a magic world, serene and beautiful. Creativity and love go hand in hand where She walks. One glimpse is enough and you will never go back to the way things used to.
Happy travels friend and don't forget to share your story with the ones who come after you. We bow before the Tao and we bow before you. May peace and love always be your travel companion!