With or Without You

You must have noticed an outstanding characteristic of every end that the ego has accepted as its own. When you have achieved it, it has not satisfied you.
(A Course in Miracles)

I remember driving one day, listening on the radio to U2’s ‘With or Without You’, realizing that this song summed up my state of mind pretty well at that time:

Through the storm, we reach the shore.
You gave it all but I want more
and I'm waiting for you.
With or without you,
I can't live with or without you.
(U2, With or Without You)

Has it ever happened to you that you really felt restless wanting or minding something, but after you finally got what you want it also didn’t satisfy you? I remember how much I hated my old stressful job, and now that I supposedly have everything I ever dreamt of, I kind of miss the thrill of mingling and competing with the best and brightest. Go figure! We all have our own journey to travel in our own shoes. I am not saying that what I am going through is representative of what other experience. I actually have met a few enlightened folks who are pretty happy no matter what, yet, it describes my current state of affairs perfectly. You may be surprised to hear this, but I no longer mind this inner restlessness.

Do you know something liberating about the ‘with or with out’ state of experiencing life? We no longer need scapegoats; we no longer wish occurrences away; we no longer regret or anticipate. Right now, I am establishing myself as author and spiritual coach and work on getting more connected across the spiritual community. Am I looking forward to being more ‘successful’ in what I do? Yes. Will I be any more happy when I am established? No! I had to smile when I read that Eckhart Tolle misses the ‘good old day’ when he could sit on a park bench, observing, and no one would notice him. Brilliant! There is nothing to look forward to, nothing to regret. Be happy here and now—that’s all to spirituality!

One day I shall reach the storm and she will be waiting there for me; and no matter how much she gives I shall be perfectly happy. But until that happy day let’s carry on with or without you.