Self-Mutulation

We all know about cancer, this strange disease that is literally and symbolically an attack on yourself. When your mind chatters on, are you attacking yourself in the process? Those who have tried monitoring the voices in their head would probably say yes. The hard thing though, we feel like the voice in our head is us in the same vein as the cancerous cells also belong to us.

I happen to have sensitive teeth and often feel the urge to 'hammer' with my tongue a particulate area where a crown feels a little too tight. This feeling doesn't exist in the morning, but gets more intensive in the evening. When I do mediative breathing the irritating feeling disappears. At one point I just figured that my cancerous mental frame and my tooth ache are actually connected. Feeling my teeth helps me to center myself again, while it is harder to detect when the voice in your head takes a turn for the worse.

A similar episode happened years ago when I realized during golf lessons that I couldn't stand up-right. At the driving range, instead of practicing my swing, I literally used most of my energy on keeping my posture straight. For years now I have taken my posture as a symbol for, well, righteousness. Align everything you say and do with your spiritual path, I told myself, and you will be able to walk straight. My posture has become much better over the years, but there is still effort involved.

Being on a spiritual path doesn't insulate you from physical problems, but it does allow you to look out for symbols and respond. You know the sad fact on cancer, if you detect it late, the recovery chances are much worse. A spiritual path is about fine tuning and reacting to imbalances as they develop.