I was drawing with the boys the other day
out of a book that had step by step drawing instructions for ghosts, witches and
similar Halloween folks, and the character they chose just happened to be Mr.
Hyde. The boys were asking why he looked so sad and angry and given that I had
little appetite to start a discussion about shadow personalities with
kindergardeners, I said that Mr. Hyde felt sad and angry because his friend, Dr.
Jekyll, didn't want to associate with him. They asked me how the story ended and
I had to admit to them that Mr. Hyde got more and more destructive to get Dr.
Jekyll's attention, but he never succeeded until the day when they both got
locked up. They were sad to hear that, but then felt better when I told them
that it was just fiction anyway.
I would guess that we all have a shadows
personality, the demon on the other side of the shoulder, sitting just next to
the angel.The spiritual path traveler has the added problem that he probably
condemns his shadow; he doesn't want to associate with him and feels guilty
about his dark drives. Yet, listening to the advice that I gave the boys,
perhaps Mr. Hyde just wants to be acknowledged and wants to be
understood.
A light worker has to have a shadow, so please understand
that what you are going through is normal. Ask and the Tao will always tell you
why your demon exists and why he acts the way he does. But you have to be
willing to look towards the shadow, otherwise Mr. Hyde will never go away and
probably scream louder and louder in the process. Hang out with Mr. Hyde and
experiment with the dark forces until you understand them. When you understand
the psychological forces as play, you perhaps can even incorporate some of your
shadow demands into your persona without undermining your spiritual journey.
Eventually you will find a way to keep your shadow at arms-length,
because the problem statement will never change, Mr. Hyde wants to march in the
opposite direction of the light worker. Of course you will find this arrangement
that works for you; this is your problem, you gave it to yourself to gain
wholeness. Spiritual path travelers have powerful allies who help you finding
and defining yourself. So relax my friend, wholeness is waiting for you. Take a
walk to the dark side and find the way that keeps your shadow at arms-length
permanently.
They say that the Christ and the Buddha at one time on their
spiritual journey just said no to their ego. Three times in total the temptation
came and went and then it was gone forever. This feat is hard to replicate and
we ordinary mortals feel guilty that we don't have the willpower like the Ones
we aspire to be. I have a slightly different experience. After a long struggle,
a dark symbol appears, it flashes by you like a vanishing dream and at that
point you just understand what the demon is up to. Willpower is required to get
you to that stage, the never-ending back and forth, the dance of shadow and
light, but the last step is as much an insight as a decision to abstain. Just
like that the insight strikes and the ostensibly never-ending struggle is
over!
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