Man's task is to become conscious of the contents that press upwards from the unconscious.
(Carl Gustav Jung)
I am playing at the Peacock Course of the Delhi Golf Course, literally surrounded by free-roaming peacocks. One bird in particular got my attention, standing there with an erect posture, for a period that seemed like an hour, apparently admiring himself in one of the mirrors that golf players use for practicing their swing. The reader of my first book, The Magnificent Experiment, knows that I devoted an entire chapter to the story of the peacock, when I discovered that this symbol has a lot of meaning for me personally.
These days I am fighting for professional survival at my work place in an industry that has come under financial strains, and I have a boss who has effectively stopped talking to me. Everything inside me knows that the best thing that could ever happen to me is to just let go of this lousy job and move on with my next career, that of a spiritual writer and coach. Yet, I find it hard to let go of this job because people look up to me there. I am somebody, just as the peacock at he Delhi golf course admires the height of its physical beauty.
Of course, were the job cuts to come, I would grief for a few weeks, would ask "why me?" and would then throw my full weight into the next career and somehow try to establish a name for myself in the overcrowded spiritual and self-help space. What a waste! The whole point of spirituality is to look through this ego game, but if subconscious processes need to be lived through then that's what will happen. The story I would be telling myself is that GOD really needs the light-worker Christian Wiese, whether it is true or not is an entirely different question.
How much nicer if I could wake up one day and say, "I have already made it. I am somebody and I don't need a fancy profession or popular books to prove myself." This day might be today, or it might be in 7 years from now, or it might be never. It is like the peacock wakes up one day and decides to only use his impressive tail size and beauty to vow the hen when she is ready to make love. Yet, is that really the mission of a peacock? What's wrong with sharing his physical wealth with all of us? What's wrong with a little vanity if others stand to benefit from it.
So it turns out, no matter what happens, whether subconscious drives are expressed, or whether we consciously awaken to our true life story, and even when we are finally ready to let go of what once was so meaningful to us, life has a rhythm to present the change of our story line just in the nick of time. Today, I am happy to view the peacock in action, and I am equally happy to take whatever life brings my way and discover the wisdom in it.