Who Would Judge the Judge?

He is a well-respected judge and gets his job done with authority and ease. Most decisions come easy to him; he knows where to research, and sometimes just knows who to ask for advice. Sure, once in a blue moon he feels indecisive but after a little soul searching he just goes for the "right" decision, that is what others would consider to be the letter of the law. The community and the family adores him but what they don't know is that every other Saturday when they think he is at work, he in fact indulges in his fetish, a paid visit to Madame Noire who humiliates and tortures him for three hours straight. There was a time when he fought his dark passion but over the years he just accepted his occasional trip to the wild side. He is at peace with himself but hopes that his dark secret will never come out.

They say that a disproportionate number of bondage and humiliation fetishists are "men of power" like the judge in our example. The desire to submit sexually may just be the mirror image of the role he has to play in society, to define what is wrong or right even though truth may be a little different than the letter of the law imply. So what would you do if you were in his shoes? Should our judge exert more will-power to control himself, not stealing away from his family on a Saturday to have his steamy fun?  Isn't that what our spiritual community does, attacking the dark side, asking for more will-power to stay on the right path? Well, what is the right path anyway? Wouldn't our judge just fight the symptoms of his problem, leaving the root cause as is?

Think of your ego as your conscious 'I' and your so-called dark side as your subconscious counterpart. The stuff you don't want to accept on the surface will bubble below it until one day it erupts. Think of it as the suppressed "I" that screams at your well-crafted persona, "Hey, what about me? Deal with me and I will give you your energy back." The reader of this blog knows we are not ego basher; we want you to respect who you are. We just advise you to be aware of who you think you are; aware of the persona that you and society have created.

So you might say where exactly is the friction - the violation of the Tao - in the case of the judge? Spiritual truth is different from the letter of the law and that unfortunately is the uphill battle the judge has to fight against. We as a society force him to violate the spiritual laws and all he finds left to do is to - subconsciously, of course - set the record straight by getting humiliated. A Tao traveler would tell you that "criminals" who violate others are as much on an evil subconscious mission as someone who "accidentally" insures someone else in a car crash.  Yet our law would never quite see it that way.

A Tao traveler would also say that God created everyone equal. The idea that someone could judge others is intrinsically flawed. The judge consequently has to experience the yin and yang of this artificial hierarchal imbalance. J. Krishnamurti talked often about this concept. The fact that some professions such as police, army, judicial professions, etc. are intrinsically violent. Sure, our society values their efforts for the simple reason what we are not yet spiritually ready to live without them. Yet the problem statement remains. Whenever you deviate from the Tao you build up a spiritual and psychological imbalance that you have to dispose of in one way or another.

We claim that once you start looking for the friction in your life you will be able to make the proper adjustments. Life - the Tao - has a habit of encouraging you to express who you truly are. It can be hard work to let go of crusts that have formed over decades, but if you follow the signals of the Way they will slowly erode as you venture into a new direction. When you are shy, life may encourage you to be more outgoing; when you are risk-averse, the encouragement may be to be more entrepreneurial. While it is hard work to face life openly it is also very rewarding. There is fun, there is creative anxiety and there is a steady erosion of your dark outlets. You harness the energies of your demon in an authentic way when you show up for life. Both the angel and your demon will cheer you on as you venture in a new direction. We don't know what works for the judge, only he will know that. What we would emphasize however, no matter what his decision might turn out to be, who would dare to judge the judge?

By Christian and Su Zhen