You Are Special

CAUSE I GONNA MAKE YOU SEE 
THERE'S NOBODY ELSE HERE,
NO ONE LIKE ME.
I'M SPECIAL, SO SPECIAL,
I GOTTA HAVE SOME OF YOUR ATTENTION.
GIVE IT TO ME!

(Brass in Pocket, The Pretenders)

Some people think some cultures are superior to others, while some people believe more educated people are somehow "better" than the working class. Some feel that taller men are more attractive while some think skinny women are hot. Do I need to go on? Probably not, I think you get the picture. 

For every opinion and value-judgement there is the opposing view right next to it. Yet you have to respect how you feel and it is often not that hard to figure out where your priors are coming from. Maybe you had to work hard to get your education so you now appreciate being surrounded by intellectuals. Or maybe you had to climb out of poverty and now enjoy living a rich lifestyle. Maybe your parents weren't so tall so you somehow appreciate size in your partner. Whatever it is that is meaningful to you personally, know that the perfect counter-example will likely knock on your door for that is what a spiritual path is all about.

Spirituality is really a way of seeing. Don't beat yourself up over your biases, just accept them as they are but be open to letting life teach you what else matters. The German mathematician and philosopher Leibniz once concluded, "we live in the best of all worlds". Everyone is special in our world and there is a way to make everyone fit in God's magnificent puzzle in a perfect way. And it is your job to experience how all the unique pieces fit into a wholesome impressionistic mosaic. Spirituality is perception - you see the world just as an artist does.

When parents see their child they see a diamond in the rough. And if some parents are somehow unable to see the gem then there will always be a special someone, a coach, a teacher, a soul partner, a child or mentor who does. Spirituality is seeing and it is in our power to see what God knows: you are special and perfect just the way you are. 

Sidestepping Yourself

A friend’s wife was cheating on him nonstop.  Finally, he couldn’t take it anymore, so they separated from each other.  How would you react if you were in his shoes? It is natural to blame the wife for her reckless behavior.  How can a wife and mother of two put the family in jeopardy? But then, would you be surprised if we told you that the wife's sister acts the same way? Could there be some unconscious programs at work that just need to come to the surface?

Look closely at your life and that of your parents and family. You will probably see for yourself that you are still doing your parents homework. Sure, your parents have come far in their shoes but they also left some unresolved issues for you to iron out. Fate is passed down from generation to generation. The story line will differ, but the underlying theme is the same. When we view it from this perspective we probably have to conclude that we have no right to look down on anyone. The power behind this insight is that we immediately lose all judgments and our arrogance, just as we have the opportunity to let go of self-pity and low self-esteem. You never had any choice to do anything differently up to this point, but with this realization you have a priceless opportunity to break free at this divine moment.

Your parents have come far; they did what they could given their circumstances. Give your children a priceless gift by breaking free from your chains here and now. You are just playing a role that has been handed down to you, so change the script in a new direction with the stroke of a pen. See for yourself that you can step outside of the person you used to identify with and you can suddenly see yourself with the perspective of an outsider. You then go beyond your past and your genes. You are liberated and rejoin your soul.

It is not easy to break free from the past, but it is possible. The ego minds if it is sidelined. That is exactly the reason why you should gladly welcome everything that is coming your way, the joy as much as the pain, the many friends as much as the so-called enemies. If you have a band-aid, you will welcome it if the nurse takes it off in one go, wouldn't you? Similarly, a little pain now and then will enable you to side-step the identity you were born into. No one wants to change direction if everything goes smoothly.  We only contemplate who we truly are in life's ups and downs. Your life is perfect from the perspective of your soul-development. Embrace whole-heartedly everything that is coming your way and learn to sidestep yourself.

 By Christian and Su Zhen

Cut out the Turkeys

I once listened to the advice of two successful businessmen, one was the owner of a sports team and the other the CEO of a Fortune 500 company and they both agreed on one thing: cut the 'turkeys' out of your life. I instinctively understood what they were saying: you can only be the best you can be if you have 100 percent faith in the team you are playing with. Doubt is like cancer, cut it out and be done with it once and for all.

I am a spiritual path traveler and not a CEO so I see things a little differently. The way I would rephrase their insight is as follows: cut out the interaction with people who you judge. Give your relationship time to heal. When your psychological wounds have healed a little, your spiritual brother and sister will step up and offer their hands one more time. 

For a Tao Master there are no turkeys. Once you have matured enough you will only meet with people who have a meaningful spiritual relationship with you. The 'villains' will not bother you because you have nothing that interests them. They will simply ignore you.
 Like Psalm 23 summarizes the Tao so well "The Lord prepares a table before me in the presence of my enemies". 

You are secure along the Tao, so the only thing you have to throw overboard is your psychological baggage and the 'turkeys' will disappear from your life for the very reason that there are none. You may ask how, that's easy, just live your life and face the music the Tao will give you plenty of opportunities to let go.

Judgment

I read the story of Gregg Braden (The Divine Matrix) who at one time had an ugly breakup with his life-partner, business partner and a "trusted friend" all at the same time. When he soul-searched what the underlying problem was he realized it was his critical attitude towards them. Once he decided to overlook and just accept their supposed faults, all three disappeared out of his life like magic.

I find this story interesting and relevant. Culturally and religiously, we are conditioned to despise certain actions. Perhaps we shouldn't. If we are in a divine play of good and evil with the goal of transcending both, we have to accept that somebody has to play the "bad guy" just to allow the good guy to shine. Do we need to applaud, from time to time, a superbly played villain? After all, they deserve Oscars in Hollywood just as much as the good guys.