Waking Up Within a Dream

Neo: "But if you already know, how can I make a choice?"

The Oracle: "Because you didn't come here to make the choice, you have already made it. You are here to try to understand "why" you made it."

I remember as a student in Graduate School a night when I argued passionately with someone that there must be more to life than just being yanked around by forces beyond our conscious control, as he claimed we were. In the meantime, I am no longer so sure. Especially after I learned about a neurological study in which researchers found a light bulb going off in our brain prior to us having become conscious of having made a decision, just as the Oracle explained it to Neo.

Both the Bhagavad Gita and the Tao Te Ching claim that that's exactly what is going on. Says Lord Krishna to Arjun in the Bhagavad Gita:

The LORD dwells deep in the heart 

of all beings, by HIS wondrous power

making them all revolve 

like puppets on a carousel.

So while I would no longer pick a fight with the student of the graduate school days, I also today understand better what irked me about his thesis at that time, it was the pointlessness of living a subconscious life. But then, we have spirituality to wake up to. We can be the spiritual aspirant who wakes up to the choices she makes, and with it, awakens to the movie we are operating in. Maybe as long as we walk the earth, we are always caught in a dream; but we can wake up within the dream and adjust the level of consciousness. Lucid dreaming is a lot of fun. Why don't you give it a try!

Lucid Dreaming

When I was a teenager I had a recurring nightmare. I dreamt that a monster was following me and as I was running away I was getting stuck in mud. It was harder and harder to keep going and the monster was steadily approaching. When it finally got a hold of me, I woke up, completely covered in sweat. Then one day someone hing magical happened; I literally woke up within the dream. As I saw the monster I realized that I must be dreaming given that I had seen this image before. And as I woke up within the dream, not only did the monster disappear but I started taking charge of my dream and manifested the stuff I wanted.

The other day someone in the Spiritual Network commented on the waking up within the dream because of a nightmare and I told her to next time use this opportunity to dream lucidly. It was then that I realized the symbolic significance of lucid dreaming. It is in fact very similar to the spiritual state of awakening. Many of us get started on a spiritual journey because of pain, because of some monsters of our own making. It is almost as if we need the fear state to muster our commitment to finish the journey Home. Fear not, the monsters that chase you are 

Life's Spiritual Wisdom

I am hardly a spiritual master but I am an expert in something; I know a lot about my human side. I certainly have experienced the greed in me and have faced my fears on countless of occasions. I also could write volumes about lust. And I know how egotistic I can be, not to mention my insecurities and jealousies.

A spiritual journey encourages you to be aware of everything that happens beneath the hood. Actually, the trick to deal with them is awareness, not repression and not confrontation. If you battle your jealousy, lust, greed or egotism, if you condemn your nature, you are really starting a war inside. It is a merry-go-around game that the voice in your head plays with itself. Actually, it is not so merry at all; it is quite destructive and cancerous. The only way you can be in harmony with your human drives is being aware of what is going on. Observe everything without getting involved; even when you hear the righteous voice in your head that feels superior to the "darker" emotions. You will realize that even this voice is the ego talking to itself.

Buddha once said, you can't think yourself into Heaven. So just being mindful of the stuff that happens inside doesn't make you a spiritual master. Yet there is an all-knowing master who is available to you any time and completely free of charge. This master is called life! When you are mindful it is not hard to figure out what life is all about. Everything that you attract, every interaction, all the so-called successes or disappointments, everything is just a reflection of your inner frame of mind. Life wraps itself around you and puts you through this virtual reality show. And while you are running after what is meaningful to you, life in fact sends you on a subconscious journey Home. We spiritual travelers encourage you to make this journey a conscious one.

The Law of Attraction folks have figured out that with the right mindset you can steer yourself in the direction of your liking. That is certainly true! In a way, the Law of Attraction insight could be compared to lucid dreamers. They have realized that you can master the art of waking up within a dream and start manipulating the dream to your advantage. That is certainly a nice power to have but we spiritual travelers want more. Why should we wake up within a dream if we can wake up period. Life is designed to bring us Home and all we have to do is to open up to it and discover its spiritual wisdom.

If you think that a spiritual path entitles you to peace, love and happiness every step of the way, you most likely will be disappointed. A spiritual journey is about gaining insights, about struggling; it is about transcending and letting go. "Not this, not that" becomes your way to proceed. A spiritual path is about de-masking the illusion. Heaven on earth is what remains once you see love shine through behind every choice.

There is no book that you can read, no master who can tell you what to do - it is your journey Home. You have to stumble through insecurities and righteousness, arrogance and humility. But after a while you realize that no matter what happens, no matter what path you might have taken last time around, life always wraps itself around you and offers you the same choice again and again: "choose love", it says. Often it whispers and sometimes it screams. There is incredible wisdom in the choices life presents. If you get lost in it, if you just follow that simple road-map life offers to you, you do not need to be wary of your human dimension at all. All distractions melt away in the busyness, loveliness and joy of living and all that remains along the Way is pure love.      

A Lucid Dream

I dreamt I had an exam to take and there was still a lot of material to review, yet I had only two evenings left to practice. As I was suffering, I suddenly realized that I was dreaming. I tried waking myself up, but then it occurred to me that perhaps I should experience my lucid dream a little instead. I used my new found powers to fly. The first jump into the air was a little scary but it worked. While I was flying I experienced colors of flowers that I had never experienced before with so much intensity, at least not in a dream. It was a nice and powerful dream. What was interesting though, while I was flying I was so intrigued with this experience and with the reaction of others, that I lost consciousness of the fact that I was dreaming. Perhaps a wake up call that we shouldn't strive after mystic powers given that the final aim of our journey is to wake up altogether?

Lucid Dreaming

Have you ever woken up within a dream and realized that you were dreaming? I experienced it numerous times when I was a teenager. I had a recurring dream pattern in which I was chased by something scary, and while I was running it appeared like I was stuck in mud and the monster I was running from came nearer and nearer. At one point I just realized that this 'stuck in the mud' scene was a dream. And as I realized that I was just dreaming, the monster disappeared and I started creating my own dream scenes. Well, I am embarrassed to admit that I used those creative powers to visualize girls into my dream, but each time when things were about to get steamy, I woke up altogether. Bummer!


I wonder today if the lucid dreaming analogy might be a good description of the spiritual evolution. Most of us seem to have some traces of psychic powers. Perhaps that is the process of waking up within the dream. You start realizing that the Law of Attraction is at play, and maya's favorites aides, time and space, get more and more compressed the further you advance on your spiritual path. You realize that your mind is the creator of your reality and then you go for the next step, to wake up from  your dream altogether. What do you think?

You are the Creator

I am sure you have read books like me on what exactly is there when you look very closely at materials and bodies: there is weird energy that seems to appear out of nothing, some weird mathematical formulas and there is a lot of space. Not to mention that the form of the energy itself is a function of the observer who looks at it. What do you make of it? Wouldn't you agree that the " reality" that you see right now may not really exist the way you think? Do you know that when you bias teachers and give them a list of supposedly highly intelligent students, the grades of these students will shoot up next year? Nothing is real, the only thing that is is your mind.

 My 4-year old son said to me that he had dreamt of a crocodile and witches and that he is scared now. I said to him that next time he sees crocodiles and witches again he just needed to remember that it must be a dream and he will surely wake up that way. You are the creator of your movie my friend, you just don't know it because you cause your dream subconsciously. 

Sure you can go now and try to use this power to manifest the stuff of your dreams: fame, a billion dollars and a harem, as one spiritual fellow-traveler once put it, but only to find that this too will not get you happiness. When I was a teenager, I once discovered the secret of lucid dreaming. I routinely used it to have sex with girls only to find that each time when the scenes got really steamy I woke up. 

No my friend, use your life to start healing and the Tao will invite you with open arms. Sure, there will be work involved as well, but the energy that I talked about in the beginning will start dancing with you. And as you honestly try to clean out all corners of your basement, you will start seeing things the way they real are. You are the creator my friend, so let the journey begin!

Dreaming Creativity

My times spent in Providence, RI as a PhD student now appears to be like a dream far in the distance. When I wrote my PhD thesis I spent many nights thinking about my models and formulas and had many instances when I couldn't figure out whether I was still awake or already dreaming.

My spiritual path often appears that way too. You struggle with a question and then suddenly answers hit you out of nowhere with the force of a sledgehammer. People saying random things to you, licence plates, music lyrics on the radio, movies, numbers appearing on watches etc. Everything makes perfect sense at the time, you admire the beauty of the connection, you are so grateful to the Source, but you also feel frustrated. No one, not even your soul partners would understand the significance and beauty of the events that are unfolding in your life. It's like a dream with so much significance and meaning, yet, when you try to relay it next morning to somebody else it feels flat in comparison. Of well, perhaps creative writing is my mission in order to share at least some of the beauty of the amazing expirience that unfolds every day.

Ego: Stuck in the Mud

Have you ever experienced lucid dreaming? I have as a teanager. I always had the same recurring dream, I needed to run away from something, but I couldn't move my legs fast enough; it seemed I was stuck in the mud. At one point when this pattern emerged something clicked in my head: I became aware of my dream and experienced my dream consciously.

You can recognize your ego in similar patterns. When you sit in a conference and you hear your colleagues are talking about your ideas, how do you feel? How does it feel to respond in a conversation deliberately a few seconds later to give others the opportunity to jump in? Is there something in your life, about your body or about others that get you worked up or passionate every time it happens? Very much as I realized that I was dreaming when I was stuck in the mud, you can take those triggers to observe how you react in those situation. The ego is you, so don't fight it and don't have conspiracy theories about it - just observe.

The stuck in the mud dream pattern has never come back, and I haven't experienced lucid dreaming since. Then I always wanted to consciously direct my dreams. I did what teenagers would do, I chased women in my dream only to find that when the hanky panky started, I would wake up. Today, I would just try to observe passively what I am dreaming. Dealing with the ego is exactly like that. Just observe what consequences your ego induced behaviour has, and what happens if you ignore your ego demands. Once you figure yourself out change might come.

Spiritual Pearls

It is the impurity in the oyster that creates the pearl. I was recently reminded of this fact when I was musing about my spiritual development. God knows, I am hardly a saint. Still, you cannot help feeling that we live in the age of spiritual empowerment. Impurities or not, we still need to strive to attain enlightenment. I would like to learn how others have overcome theirs. You never know, some of these stories might be spiritual gems.

A little background about my spiritual resume. I spent the first 25 years of my life wondering whether Jesus really was the magician the bible claims he was. I just wasn't sure what was fact and what was fiction. I then discovered the lifestory of the same spirit (Sri Ramakrishna in my case, who lived 150 years ago, but rest asure, there are many others) and suddenly understood that the sons and daughters of God can move mountains if they so choose. But I also felt that you have to be a saint to become this eternal spirit. Today, I am no longer so sure. I feel an ever increasing number of people connect with the Source these days. Chances are, you and I are among the chosen as well.

This brings me to my title. Perhaps we can jumpstart our spiritual careers a bit by focusing on our remaining not so spiritual tendencies. You cannot suppress or attack them, you have to let them run their course. I would love to hear what other people do. I think the best way to succeed is to bring your tendencies out into the light.

When I wrote this blog, I remembered something that happened during my teenage years. When I was dreaming, I suddenly became aware about this state. Do you know the feeling when you are running away from somebody in your dream and you have difficulties moving your legs? Well, this was a recurring dream of mine then and at one point it just registered that I was dreaming whenever this scene occurred. When this awareness happened, I suddenly started creating my own plot. In a sense, I woke up within my dream. As I said, I was a teenager then and mostly tried to do some hanky-panky with girls. This actually never worked out. I always woke up just at the time when things seemed to get interesting. Apparently, you are limited in creating your literal dream destiny after all.

You can develop a similar kind of awareness about your interaction with others. When you recognize certain pattern in yourself, you can step outside of yourself and see and hear your ego in action. When I spot him these days, I welcome him with a gentle "hallo, little fellow". Similarly, I sometimes see myself lecturing others, in which case I warmly acknowledge the Al Gore in me. Lastly, and somewhat embarrassingly, I have been called a peacock more than once. Well, when I see myself acting up in front of women, I suddenly hear a loud "cock-a-doodle-do"- that's pretty deflating as well. Marianne Williamson remarked that spirituality is the art of embracing your contradictions. Please tell me how you got your spiritual pearls.