Drifting Down the River

Whenever your struggles arise, it means that you are deviating from the truth and you are functioning on your own as a separate individual.  You believe that you need to work hard to secure your life; you believe that you need to count on your own; and you believe that, if you don’t do so, your life will be in danger.

Today is the day to let go of these belief sets and know that you are not on your own and you are not a separate individual.  You are well protected and well guided.  As a matter of fact, you are carried down by the flow.  Everything is coming to you effortlessly as you drifting down the river.  As a matter of fact, everything you need is already manifested and waiting for you; every thing you need to experience is already on its mind.  Just relax and let it carry you along!

Enjoy the breathtaking scenery along the river!  Have fun!

By Suzanne Yang

Where there is a Will, there is Way

Our Mother in Heaven,
hallowed be Your Name.
Your Kingdom come,
your Will be done,
on earth as it is in Heaven.
(The Lord’s Prayer)

There is a desire, and then there is a Desire.

There is a wish, there is will-power and there is a Will.

There is Consciousness, the ability to grasp what is of God.

When we speak of the Way we mean to say that life flows through us.

When we speak of the Way, we mean to say that we come in the Name of God.

Without desire we manifest Desire. Without a wish, no will-power is necessary.

You might say, where there is a Will, there is a Way!

Enjoy the Journey of Being a Human Being!

The other night I had a dream.  In this dream, one of family members passed away.  I was crying with the other families.  While I was crying, I also heard myself talked to myself that I was going to be rich.  And then I heard my mind was scolding myself for having such dirty thought at such moment. All of a sudden, I observed that I was observing myself even I was dreaming.  All the scolding and self talk suddenly stopped right there.

I am sure you must have very similar experiences like I had in my dream. We are scolding ourselves for the thoughts that arise in us and we identify ourselves as that thought. And then the mind starts a war inside. Consciousness is lost at this moment.

Do you discover that yet?  This is how the mind is creating all the suffering and conflicts in our life when we identify ourselves with our mind. Mind is just mind. It talks to itself, and it jumps to conclusions. Minds judge and have have preferences. Minds have opinions; they anticipate, they interpret, and whatever they may do, they are not us and are not the truth. When you can recognize minds in action, leave them alone. They cannot influence you and bother your peace. However, whenever you identify with them, you take them for real and take action accordingly. You are bound to live in a conflicted world.  That’s fine too.  Whatever happens, it’s just like an audience suddenly forgot her reality and joins the movie. You can still have fun too.

The same with the emotions arising in you.  When you identify with any emotion arising in you, you start to worry how to lose or to keep them.  As a matter of fact, they are not you either.  They are just visitors to your consciousness.  Enjoy them, experience them, and learn from them.  All the energy carries some messages for us.  Decode them, help them accomplish their mission and they will disappear.

Enjoy the journey of being a human being!

By Suzanne Yang

From ‘Me, Myself and I’ to SELF’

We sometimes meet folks who are full of ‘me, myself, and I’. Well, as a matter of fact, I used to meet them but I haven’t met them in a while. Awakening really does protect us from headaches.

The ‘I-identity’ is not necessarily a ego—the Me, Myself, and I’ is. The ‘I-identity’ is a personality blanket instead. Some blankets are cozy, some look good, some are outright nice. Along an Awakening journey though, personality blankets shouldn’t be washed, fixed up or colored, they should be dropped altogether. Until we are really ready through, we follow the longings of our Soul. The Soul is really a GPS steering us Home over the lifetimes despite all ego inferences. Like puppets, we are led by God’s maya.

The SELF—GOD’s VOICE— is at our disposal the moment we strip naked of this personality blanket. For some this is a sudden occurrence, for others there are regular glimpses of the SELF in meditation, and in life itself. I used to listen to the SELF in songs on the radio, and had many Angels telling me what lies Beyond myself. Now I always feel embedded in SELF, mostly.

The Bible says, ‘Be still and know I AM GOD’. The famous I AM THAT I AM experience is at our disposal here and now. There comes a time when even the Soul has outlived its usefulness. The journey is finished and we are finally free. It is the end of an ancient journey—from ‘Me, Myself and I’ to SELF.

Choose love

We are love.  Our true nature is love. Whenever our ego decides to close our heart, we feel like we are destroying ourselves and the heart is contradicting instead of expanding.  That's why I can only choose love no matter what!

By Suzanne Yang

Signposts of the Way

Our Mother in Heaven,
hallowed be Your Name.
Your Kingdom come,
your Will be done,
on earth as it is in Heaven.
(The Lord’s Prayer)

The Way is not a journey measured in distance.

The Way is not to be understood in units of time.

The Way connects the ‘here and now’ again and again.

There is no ‘progress’ along the Way.

There is only a repeat of perfect opportunities to travel with Her.

Looking back we may perceive ‘progress’;

looking back we may feel ‘liberated’,

but this is merely an illusion of mind.

Here and now we are free—always!

Disentanglement

A spiritual path is a way to liberation; a way towards freedom. In the beginning, it is liberation from the entanglement from our family; then it is liberation from our mind, our emotions, and the body; and then it is liberation from this society; eventually, it is liberation from our soul.  Then we are free!  Back to being, free, alive, and carefree!
(Suzanne Yang, A Way to Liberation)

Everything is energy. We are energy. Our interaction with friends and our loved ones are energy systems with bonds and reaction functions arising from our childhood, from society and linkages that reach back over lifetimes. Awakening then is the process of cutting outgrown entanglements and devoting our energy to purer forms of manifesting love. Around an Awakening journey the people we hang out with and associate with often change quite drastically. Professions change, as can be the locations we live in. How then can we accelerate this ascension process? Well, we can study our prevailing energy links and can decide where to put our conscious energy. But then, life really does that for us. All we have to do is to be mindful of what happens to us. Spiritual insights come en masse once we truly open up to life and become mindful of ourselves and our surroundings.

Questions to ask are:
What do we give energy to?
Does this energy serve a spiritual purpose?
Are we cycling between energy fields such as the never-ending battle of good and evil. Are we perhaps miserable with our without our loved ones, our profession, etc.
Why do we do what we do?
How can we let go of outgrown energies?
How can we consciously change directions?

Two paths lead us Home, the experience of a purposefully lived life and the spiritual insights that we acquire in the process. Experience makes us aware of the energy links with karmic bonds, people and our own belief sets. Life encourages us to let go of outgrown entanglements, and the burdens of the past. Insights help us to recognize these linkages that we somehow missed before. With this disentanglement process we finally understand what we sign up for when we deal with particular people, or the work in our chosen profession. Insights help us to put conscious effort towards a path that serves a higher spiritual purpose.

There is a path to freedom. Some travel this journey a little faster than others, but we all do, spiritual or not. Everyone is on a subconscious journey Home, and Awakening is merely the final stretch of the journey when these disentanglement processes are within consciously grasp. Spiritual progress then happens much faster. Break free—follow life’s energy and enjoy the many insights along the Way!

The End of Judgement

The path to holiness is wholeness, and wholeness is acquired by opening up to life’s wisdom while dropping some of our outgrown  belief systems. The biggest problem to the spiritual ascension is getting caught in an endless battle of good and evil without finding a way out. Whenever you hear a ‘you must’ at the back of your head, you might be cycling on your journey without any possibility of escape.

Sex is fine if we use it as a physical expression of love. Enjoying a love triangle is possible if this living arrangement works for everyone. Living in abundance is fine as long as our wealth doesn’t own us. Being in the lime-light is brilliant as long as we serve a spiritual purpose with our fame. You fill in the blanks if your soul longings clash with the preconceived notions of spirituality. You carve your path and tell us about it.

The end of judgement was a lesson I had to learn. We become old souls by experience, not by wishing our cravings away. Eventually though, holiness awaits us. Eventually, all these cravings drop because deep down we are only love. There comes a time when everything we do and perceive is pure love. Rome wasn’t build in a day and likely neither is our journey Home. Meanwhile though, are there any belief systems life encourages you to drop?

The soul is our GPS, but our ego gets us there

A spiritual path is a way to liberation; a way towards freedom. In the beginning, it is liberation from the entanglement from our family; then it is liberation from our mind, our emotions, and the body; and then it is liberation from this society; eventually, it is liberation from our soul.  Then we are free!  Back to being, free, alive, and carefree!
(Suzanne Yang, A Way to Liberation)

The saying goes that we should be in tune with our Self—our ever-present God connection—and should be mindful of the rascal called ego. Well, that works for the folks who have an ongoing God connection, for the spiritual newcomers I would say don’t be too harsh on the ego. Our soul might be our GPS but we need our ego to get us there.

Spiritual freedom comes in stages. For some spiritual Awakening starts when they are finally able to see beyond themselves and manage to take other people’s agendas and feelings into consideration. For other’s it’s the ability to let the ego work on the soul longings without constantly throwing wrenches into the works. A few reach spiritual heights that even surpasses soul longings for they are nothing but recycled karmic relationships over the lifetimes.

If this all sounds a bit academic to you, the daily game plan is always the same. Be mindful and follow life’s energy. Spirit—our Self—is always present to show us the Way.

Essence

I was born to a complicated family. Both my parents’ former spouses died unexpectedly in their twenties. They also got together in an unconventional way. My father moved in with my mother to a strange village he had never lived in. It implied that my father had a lower social economic status in this family. I think that this arrangement undermined his confidence and self esteem. I could sense this since I was little. It seems to me my father lived with this shadow his whole life. This whole situation influenced my confidence and self esteem as well. I always felt like an outsider in the little village I grew up.

We lived in a remote village in Yilan, Taiwan. Both my parents were farmers. They worked very hard to support our family. When I attended the junior high school, I didn’t have any self confidence at all. Its the best junior high school in that county and it’s in the city. For a farm girl from a remote village, I felt terribly bad about myself.

In my lunch box, there used to be just rice and an egg. One day, one of my classmates asked me how come there was only an egg with rice? Just imagine how I felt. Although I didn’t expect that I would stand out in that school as I used to be in my little village school, I stood out again. And one of my best friends was the daughter of a local rich and powerful family. I still remember how I felt when I was invited to her house for dinner. Her mom served us with lobsters, shrimps, and lots of crabs.

Out of good luck, when it was time to go to college, I was lucky enough to go to the best university in Taiwan. And then my self esteem plummeted again. Most of my classmates are from Taipei. I was from the countryside. I felt that I was like a barbarian.

After I graduated from graduate school, I hung out with lots of expatriates from all over the world, powerful and rich people. I still remember how I felt inferior when I hung out with them.  How I felt inferior as an Asian! It seems to me that my whole life has been battling with low self esteem and inferior issues until my father was very sick. It was until that time I realized that, race, social status, education, appearance, job, none of them could define me. They are just like garments we put on our souls. Deep down we all are the same. We all age, will die one day, get sick and lose our loved ones sooner or later. We all have the same fate. It was until that time I recognized my essence. It was until then I could hang out with people with different social status and races with ease. We all are one.

By Suzanne Yang

Thought-Feeling-Energy

I had an important break-through this year. Finally the kundalini energy in me has reached a level where I can regularly experience serenity, peace of mind, and even a state where thoughts are completely absent. The experience is that of a walking meditation, the state of being a time-less observer without having an agenda of any form. Alas, while I can influence these states a little with rhythmic breathing and keeping my spine erect, I am unfortunately still absolutely dependent on life’s occurrence. Take something away from me that is meaningful for me, and I will be as human as anyone, and sometimes, even more so.

Our spiritual community takes issue with our monkey mind but they fight merely a symptom, not the root cause. Thoughts and feelings are connected. They respond to the energy of the moment; the energy of the moment at hand and the energy that is running through us. Life happens as it does, and we are embedded in it as we are, our thoughts and feelings merely depict the life story we are coining. Can we influence this fact of life by becoming aware of the fact that we are just creative storytellers? Absolutely! Can we control ‘thought-feelings energy’ completely? I don’t think so. Threaten our loved ones and I want to see any guru keeping his calm.

There are many yoga disciplines to get these ‘thought-feeling-energies’ under control. I respect those. I am not big into meditation but I still had a kundalini energy break-through. Over the years, I worked on keeping my spine erect and on rhythmic breathing, otherwise my serenity really comes from being a keen observer in the busyness of life, and from my spiritual writings. Everyone has an idiosyncratic way of connecting with the Beyond. So while I don’t have advice to offer on specific technique there is something I advice all my clients in the following way, ‘clean up your life!’ Cut our all conflict of interests; follow the positive energy and use the prevailing negative energy for self-reflection.

The final steps of the journey is laser like. We zoom our ‘Thought-Feeling-Energy’ into Her, and we see Her wherever we walk and whatever we do. We are also not any different than the folks who have both feet in their lives, our bodies are certainly wired in the same way, but our ‘Thought-Feeling-Energy’ is 100 percent pure and wholesome. We are walking meditations with fully circulating kundalini energy and a magnet that attracts Divinity wherever we walk. With spring cleaning around the corner, do you have an inspiration how can you adjust your ‘Thought-Feeling-Energy’ a little?

Why Are We Suffering?

Have you ever observed why we are suffering?  We are suffering mostly because we don’t live our truth.  Instead, we try to force our truth into some norms, definitions, rules, models, expectations, or decisions.  Of course, our truth won’t be able to fit into these mind-made models.  If we do try to fit ourselves into some models, mostly we will feel that we are inadequate, not good, not right, or not making enough efforts.  The truth is, none of us can fit into these models.  These models are dead but we are alive.  We don’t really have any definite shape or size.  These models are just like square, rectangle, or circle, we are like irregulars, we can never fit into these dead models.

No wonder that most of us don’t feel that we fit into this society.  It’s basically a mission impossible!  We can work hard and force ourselves to fit in some of the models though.  However, deep inside, we feel we are dead and are constantly in struggles.  This is how we create conflicts in us.  No wonder that most of us feel conflicted and struggling all the time.

You can observe this truth by observing yourself to fit into some models, like being happy, a girl, mother, husband, teacher, movie star, priest…as soon as you say you are something, you feel you are not that.  Now what can you do with that?  Pretend you are that?  Or force yourself to be that? We have some jobs to do in this life.  That’s all.  Nothing can define us.  We are that!

By Suzanne Yang

Just be

My work was something of a club of over-achievers
I always wanted to be part of it so bad.
I was tolerated, even respected, but stayed outside of it.
The moment I decided to be part of it, I was!

Spirituality is exactly like that.
You search and strive, looking for the ‘Beyond’.
The moment you realize that God is here and now.
All searching and striving is gone forever.
(The Promotion, Christian Wiese)

I had a break-through experience a while back. I decided that I was finally ‘there’ and I was. It’s not the ‘be here now and be happy’ mantra. No, it was the realization that all we have to be is to be authentic and let life take us from there. Inner conflicts? I have them. Inconsistencies? Absolutely! Ego rants? You bet! What creates my inner peace is that I am transparent with myself and my loved ones about everything, and then let life take me on a transformation course just by being my authentic self. With an attitude like that, what is there to fear and what is there to regret? Every day you get up and have another Spirit filled day to look forward to. Just be!

Be smart when you follow your heart

My clients sometimes ask me, ‘what if I mess up?’, ‘what if I go back to my destructive habits’, and I typically reply, ‘well, if you mess up then so be it. Just skip the self-judgment, clean up the mess and try better next time around!’. A spiritual Awakening process is just like building a foundation. It prepares you for a break-through experience to leave the lower energies behind and Ascend to the higher vibration experience once and for all. A foundation has to be laid properly. It has to withstand the test of time, so don’t be surprised if it takes a little back and forth before you are ready to move on.

When we say, ‘the heart wants what it wants’, we are really saying that we follow the energy of the moment. Can we scheme ourselves away from the lower energy fields just as Ulysses tied himself to the mast to hear the Sirens’ song? Absolutely, but we can’t run away from life either. Along the Ascension process people naturally clear out while new friends come along; professions and locations get changed. We should be smart about positioning ourselves for a new high vibration environment, but we can’t run away from life either. If old energies keep knocking on our door we have to deal with them.

Let heart and mind assist in the Ascension process together, but let life decide how to proceed. Ulysses anticipated his reaction function, enjoyed the experience of the Sirens’ song without undermining himself. Often the problem though is that we don’t even understand our reaction function. We are caught in an energy field that we can later track back to a childhood trauma or some character traits that have been super-imposed on us. We need the broken China on the floor to wake up to it. Even the famous ‘soul longings’ can be dramas repeated over lifetimes that one day we need to break free from.

We are all in the same boat. I may have a little bit more experience positioning myself for Ascension process but I made exactly the same mistakes, often even with a good intention going into it. These days when I mess up I ask my soul mates for advice, or I reach out in the expert network in our spiritual community. Become transparent with yourself and others. Mistakes are fine, and happen to everyone, but getting caught in an ongoing energy battle of outlived karmic bonds is really, really painful. So be smart when you follow your heart and lay the foundation for your break-through experience.

Frequency

Everyone you meet in a day responds to our frequency. We are giant walking magnets, emitting and attracting what we want, secretly desire and fear into our lives. The Law of Attraction folks try to make a life philosophy out of this fact of life, where as I only try to rid myself of the the stuff that is not my authentic self. So the question then for everyone becomes, how can we consciously adjust our frequency?

Intention does the job for me. I only surround myself with people who have a good intention at heart. Problems are fine, negative thinking is ok, what it is not ok for somebody is to scheme to get something. As you do, and as you try to figure out what the other guy is all about, you automatically lower your vibration and throw a wrench into the workings of Spirit.

They say thinking interferes with our ability to experience God. Well, let me tell you that when I am with you I do not think. I interact with our vibration. I feel you. Our frequencies got us into this room and I let Spirit elevate our interaction as far as I am able to do. Some friends vanish with that approach, other soul bonds get cemented over lifetimes. That’s the power of frequency. Use it!

Abundance

As difficult as this human life may be, I am really grateful for all the experiences it brings!  How could I taste human love if I were formless?  How could I experience so many different forms of emotions?  How could I smell the flowers and hear the birds?  How could I taste the food?  How could I travel the world and enjoy the breathtaking view of the earth?  How could I be astonished by this spectacular world?  How could I know heartbreak?  How could I know there are so many different kinds of people?  How I could taste the abundance of life?  How could I learn?

Even more amazing is, if you realize that you are not just your forms, your body, your emotions, and your thoughts, you can experience and enjoy formless and forms at the same time!  You experience the abundance a life can provide but at the same time you experience the eternal bliss in the background!  Everything just becomes like a game, a game for you to enjoy, to experience, and to learn!  Your life is at the same time deep and broad!  And you taste the magnificence of life!  Isn't this the life consciousness having in mind and enjoying?

Yes, Heaven is here!  Here and now!  Enjoy!

By Suzanne Yang

The World is Our Mirror

I remember once a woman in a spiritual community stating that she had successfully cut all negative people out of her life, and the only remaining annoying voice was that of her son. My stomach turned when I read it. While I didn’t know anything about the situation she was in at that time, I have come to a drastically different conclusion as I traveled my journey of spiritual transformation. By reaching for the light there is also so much raw darkness drifting to the surface for us to digest, and the best thing we can do is to accept our environment as the dirty mirror that tells us how much healing we have to do ourselves. By carefully polishing this mirror we are finally in a position to separate the wheat from the chaff so to speak. I never cut anyone from my life until Kali Maa tells me that it is time.

The River

Just as a river does not continue its flow after discharging into the ocean, so also a person loses all movements after he merges in the Self.
Ramana Maharshi

We are drifting downstream in a beautiful, life-giving river and we are contemplating what it will feel like when we finally merge with the ocean. This is spiritual by-passing! The river sustains fresh-water fish that cannot survive in the ocean. Likewise, we can enjoy our life here and now and serve God that way. God gave us yin to worship as Her manifestation. God gave us children to raise as gods. God gave us friends to horse around with, and a job to express our creativity with. Enlightenment comes when it comes. Let’s welcome Divinity moment by moment.

When Love Wants to Express Herself through You

When love wants to express herself through you,
you have to get out of your way and let her lead.
Or you will find you go against the flow,
And you are destroying yourself!

When love wants to express herself through you,
you have to surrender,
All the ideas, expectations, past traumas and ego have to go.
Only pure love stays and shines her way through!

When love wants to express herself through you,
you better let her do it.
All the struggles and resistance will be in vain,
until love burns everything else but herself!
And then you realize,
This is not you,
this is something far bigger and stronger.
This is love leading your life!

By Suzanne Yang

The Moment in Time is Now

I want one moment in time
when I'm more than I thought I could be;
when all of my dreams are a heartbeat away
and the answers are all up to me.
Give me one moment in time
when I'm racing with destiny.
Then in that one moment of time
I will feel,
I will feel eternity.
(Whitney Houston, One Moment in Time)

I was sitting in my car listening to Whitney Houston’s ‘One Moment in Time’ and was feeling the famous moment in time. As the light was streaming in, I was wondering, why is she referring to the future. This timeless moment is always here. Do you feel it right now?

Bert Hellinger and Me

I first met Bert Hellinger in Kuala Lumpur in 2008 when I joined one of his training seminars for family constellation facilitators.

I still remember that opening session.  All of us were like being bathed in divine light, full of tears, joy and healing!  It felt like all the angels and healing masters joined this seminar too.  So much love and healing energy were flowing in that evening!  Souls were purified, frozen energy was released, traumas and secrets were revealed and healed, reconciliation made, love and life started to flow again!

I have been since flowing in this life river and started my own healing journey!  I have learned so much about healing, traumas, soul, and family dynamics in the following training sessions and my own practice!

However, I just couldn’t put them into words to express what I have learned, experienced and done in these healing sessions!  They are simply mysteries beyond words and you need to experience these miracles for yourself!

* Bert Hellinger (born 16 December 1925, in Leimen, Baden, Germany as Anton Hellinger) is a German psychotherapist associated with a therapeutic method best known as Family Constellations and Systemic Constellations. In recent years, his work has evolved beyond these formats into what he now calls Movements of the Spirit-Mind.

By Suzanne Yang

The power of solitude

"One man runs to his neighbor because he is looking for himself, and another because he wants to lose himself. Your bad love of yourselves makes solitude a prison to you."
Nietzsche, Thus Spoke Zarathustra

It’s easy to ride other people’s energy and feel uplifted and empowered in the process. It is nice to recognize the sister in a sacred exchange of spiritual energies. Yet, to find Divinity in solitude is harder. There is nothing to hold onto. There is no point of reference. Jesus went into the desert for 40 days. Buddha practiced meditation for seven. The last steps across the bridge have to be taken by ourselves. Our soul siblings can only lead us up to it. Relax, anything this outer world has to offer can be found inside, and then some. So when solitude presents itself embrace it, don’t run from it.

Enlightenment—A Backward Movement

I joined Adyashanti’s Toronto meeting this weekend.  In one of his talks he mentioned a backward spiritual movement, which I couldn’t agree more with and love to share it. He mentioned that we all tend to move toward whichever we are inspired with or called for and it seems to be an endless journey, or forever journey for most of the people. And then he said, for spirituality, instead of moving forward, we move backward.  For example, if you are inspired to get enlightenment.  Instead of moving forward and making endless effort to be enlightened, moving backward and realize that you are already enlightened.  It is enlightenment that wants to express itself through you.  All your efforts, on the contrary, undermine this fact and put you into a state that you are not.

I couldn’t agree with him more.  The trick is to recognize that you are not you.  You are the consciousness that wants to express herself through you and experience this life through you. Do you get it?  Hope you do!

By Suzanne Yang

Spiritual Transformation

Before enlightenment, chop wood and carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood and carry water. (Zen saying)

There are friends in our spiritual community I look up to. Yet, if I were to call them ‘enlightened’ they would laugh in my face and tell me to drop all labels. So what to do? Should we just ban the expression ‘enlightenment’ until we finally meet someone who literally walks on water? I go with the famous Zen saying, everyone on spiritual journey shall get that taste of freedom, but after this blessed satori moment we have to return to our human roots anyway. All the while our spiritual transformation continues, this certainly also applies to my ‘enlightened’ friends.

Satori moments abound along an Awakening journey. The time when time stands still. The feeling that our ‘I-perception’ is just a thought, a feeling, that we can leave behind like a set of clothes. Or the realization that we are bathing in light come rain or shine. So why don’t we leave it like that, we enjoy these countless blessings, but we are as happy to continue chopping wood and carrying water when the time comes. The Tao Te Ching says, ‘Heaven is in earth, and earth is in Heaven’. We have to accept this fact of life and embrace it.

I graphic develops the idea of a spiritual transformation as a process quite well. We may just have enjoyed peace, love and stillness, but then again we are at it again, with more water to carry and wood to chop. A sudden meanness, a lingering depression, a craving or lust, and once again life takes us to the cleaners and transforms us in the process. It’s ok. Let life do its dance and we follow along. Let’s enjoy our spiritual transformation.

Kundalini energy to the rescue

You probably know this scene where the mind races in loops. We are upset about something but there is nothing we can do about the situation anyway. Our monkey mind is just driving us crazy over nothing. Well, I have found an amazing solution to the problem. I lie flat on my bed and activate kundalini energy with rhythmic breathing until it rises from my root chakra up my spine. After a short while I experience little bubbles in my neck area, followed by a ringing in my ear. Once the kundalini energy rises into my head all thoughts cease automatically and there is nothing but a serene feeling of emptiness and contentment. I can continue this as long as I please and when I stop feel refreshed just like having had a short nap. Ego, with kundalini to the rescue, what mischief can you cause now?

Breaking free

A glimpse is enough to initiate the Awakening process which is irreversible.
(Eckhart Tolle)

Breaking free of what exactly? Of the ego? The ego is us, how can we break free from ourselves?  Well, as it turns out, there are different degrees of freedom. We say someone is full of ego if everything is about him is oozing, ‘me, myself and I’. An ego is someone who simply cannot see beyond himself. Then comes the stage when someone becomes aware of his own agenda, and how it lines up or clashes with those of others. He can feel others, just as he becomes aware of his own feelings and thoughts. We may call this person, mature, humanistic, ethical, or spiritual, but just being considerate of others is not yet the stage of ‘breaking free’. Awakening takes place when we perceive first glimpses of Oneness. We become aware that our thoughts and feelings are just phenomena that are separate from the being experiencing it. We manage to step out of ourselves and can occasionally merge with the feelings, thoughts and experiences of others. This is the realm of mystical experiences that are hard to describe but for everyone who has experienced them, they quickly become a second nature. The last stage of freedom is when the entire ‘I-structure’ starts slipping away. Oneness becomes available almost at command. This is typically the stage when we call someone enlightened.

I send out a survey to some thirty long-standing spiritual friends and one respondent put Awakening in the following way: “There was not one singular Awakening experience for me. I was born Awake to more than my ‘singular’ self and perpetually throughout my life have experienced mediumship, multi-dimensionality, lucid dreaming, visions, clairvoyance and clairaudience.” That’s a classic case of ‘breaking free’, but there are countless others. In the survey we had many separate unitive experiences from experiencing synchronicity and angels, to practicing countless talents like the before mentioned example. This group is also full of empaths who can literally feel the energy of the environment and the people they are operating in. A common perception in this group is that they are being transformed by a higher Power. All it often takes is one unitive experience and a journey starts with a destination only God knows about. I also experienced what Eckhart Tolle concludes, once the genie is out of the bottle, you can’t put her back. A lifelong mission Home starts that can be delayed but never be reversed again.

Let God make you special

Deep inside of me there is an understanding that I am a god, ruling in a loose alliance with 8 billion other equal spiritual citizens. Tell me that I come second to anyone and I will either pick up the gauntlet, or walk my merry way. Next to me, inequality doesn’t exist because my free spirit doesn’t tolerate it. The exception of course is service. When I see God shining through in the friend I interact with, I am happy to lie humbly in the dust.

The search for enlightenment is often caused by the the feeling that life as we experience it is not worth our while, or it is a subconscious power trip, cleverly disguised by our ego. It’s ok though. Once we hand over the reigns to God we are shown that life is worth living for moment by moment. We are also shown that we are an essential part of God’s beautiful mosaic. If we let Her, She will make us special.

A spiritual journey is a cleverly designed course of disentanglement, not with life itself, mind you, but with our ego-centered perspective of what life is about, or should be about. Successes and failures are of the ego, for us spiritual travelers only life ‘as is’ matters and is worth living for. God makes us special along this journey, but how so, may only be meaningful to us. It’s ok, not everyone is able to perceive God’s mosaic of life.

When I reflect on my own achievements I have to conclude that I was pretty special in my old financial sector job. I surrounded myself with the best of the industry and together we were mostly a step away of the competition in figuring market themes up. You may see this an an ego outlet, and it certainly was, but it was also a holy alliance of friends who cared for each other and rallied to the occasion as one.

These days I spend my time writing and educating the next wave of spiritual ascendents. I am doing a fine job in this direction, with notes like this for example. What really makes me special though is my one-on-one work with my clients who have specific issues that hold them back. Solving these interferences with the Holy Spirit is what makes me truly special, but then, I am just Her medium. God makes me special!

Freedom resides in our heart

‘The Unsaid’ is a movie in which a sexually abused boy went on a killing spree as an adolescent. His treating psychologist—Andy Garcia—had lost a son to suicide as well, and managed to prevent him from taking his life and transferring him to an institution that finally addressed his abuse. “What does it help?”, the young man said, “I will be locked up here!” Andy Garcia replies, “freedom is here”, and pointed to his heart. He got a handball out of the pocket they both had been playing with before and started bouncing it.

I had tears in my eyes when I saw this scene. Freedom is so simple to achieve—it’s literally a feeling. There are some who are happy in prison, and there are others who are miserable on an expensive vacation resort in the Caribbean. Our love is inside, our power and our freedom are inside. Freedom resides in our heart!

Already Home

It occurred to me the other day
that I am already ‘there’.

Surrounded by people I love,
on a mission I signed up for at birth.

Once you realize that the path is the goal
you are already ‘there’.

All worries and expectations disappear,
playfully you enjoy every day.

There may be moments when I forget, but
this moment I realize, I am already Home!

Welcome the class of 2018/2019

I have been reading the announcements of an upcoming energy shift with interest for a few years. As some of you know, my Awakening started in 2007/2008 and I have literarily met a few ‘class mates’ who went through the Ascension process at the same time, and even experiencing similar symptoms. The Ascension wave of 2018/2019 could well attract even more ‘newcomers’. Over the summer I got countless questions on synchronicity and my blog note, ‘Synchronicity—enjoy the ride’ got numerous hit, catapulting it to number 2 in the all-time favorite within just a few months. These days many of my friends experience kundalini energy surges, and recently I saw three questions in the different spiritual communities that were about kundalini energy symptoms in one day!

Amazing! Enjoy the ride would be my message, but also understand that Awakening is a process. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither ends our journey Home in a day, unless of course, you are one of the new spiritual giants, which could well be the case. I just consider myself one of many. Still, feel free to reach out with questions, and if some of you spiritual sages read this, stand ready to give our new Awakening generation a few pointers as well. I am not shy to admit that I was guided by a spiritual heavy-weight and can only recommend reaching out to others. It makes the journey a lot more fun, and it is a whole lot faster.

Prisoner of our mind

Whether we realize it or not,
we all are free.
We are only kept
in prison by our mind.

By Suzanne Yang

It never rains in Southern California

Seems it never rains in southern California
Seems I've often heard that kind of talk before
It never rains in California, but girl, don't they warn ya?
It pours, man, it pours.
(It never rains in Southern California; Songwriters, Albert Hammond / Mike Hazlewood)

There are 266 days of sunshine in San Diego and 166 days in Cleveland Ohio. I always think of Awareness like the the blue sky. It is always there, but sometimes clouds move in, or showers. We do our daily stuff, we get caught in our silly affairs, but deep down inside many of us spiritual travelers know that the sun is shining up there.

Not everyone wants Awareness. Some are too busy blaming the past, or too involved scheming for the future. Some want sex, some success, some want revenge, power or money, and some want to find the love in a partner that they are lacking inside. It’s ok! The heart wants what it wants. Never for a moment think that only because you are seeking Awareness you are a cut above them. You are not!

I admire our gurus and spiritual teachers for describing the perfect Caribbean beach weather for us, but for my clients in Cleveland, Ohio who have been dumped another 10 inches of snow onto their driveway the ‘be here now and the sun is gonna shine’ gospel is just not so helpful. Perhaps I have more useful advice for them. I can tell them that if sunshine is what they are after, San Diego might be a better location for them.

Awakening is a journey inward. The sun is always shining but as we become aware of the games we are playing with ourselves we see it ever more often. Some folks need to overcome inner resistance; some need to empower themselves, some need to face their demons, some need to forgive others, and many need to forgive themselves. Almost everyone—myself included—has to find the power and love inside.

I am a spiritual coach and I can help you open up to Awareness ever more often. It is like experiencing sunshine 266 days in the year rather than 166 by moving south. What I can’t help you with is leading you all the way. Only God and your Self can do that. Again though, the ‘It never rains in Southern California’ metaphor might be a helpful one. What is sometimes lost in the pleasant tune, the lyrics also warns, ‘when it rains, it pours!’

The last step is complete surrender. You see the vortex coming at you, you shake in your boots, but you jump into it because there is no other choice. The last piece of the spiritual mosaic is to completely open to the purging experience and facing it like a man on the chin, or a woman on a Kali Maa cleansing trip. I always repeat the same message in all my writings, life is designed to take us Home anyway, so let’s enjoy the sunshine!

Fleeting emotions

These fleeting emotions are here to teach you that you are not your emotions, and then you can be at peace with them.  Enjoy them from a distance like watching mountains covered with beautiful clouds!  Then suddenly you are in touch with the eternal, timeless, silent, loving and peaceful part of yourself!  And realize you are love and love no matter what the situation may be.

Enjoy!

By Suzanne Yang

Everything is perfect

You will only analyze the past,
or speculate on the future,
if you think something is missing.

Take a good look around,
don’t you see that everything is perfect.
She is around, every step of the Way.

Is That You?

Is that you?
That heartbreaking feeling feels like a nail is piercing your heart,
also like a hammer pounding right over there,
making your heart stop beating,
and bleed to death!

Is that you?
Like a kite flying up in the sky,
like an angel playing,
like a woman in love,
your heart is singing,
and your body is dancing!

Is that you?
Your face is red,
your heartbeat fast,
your sound is filled with anguish,
you are yelling and accusing like mad!

Is that you?
They are not you!
They are just clouds passing through your sky!

Enjoy!

By Suzanne Yang

Trust life

You can’t think yourself into Heaven.
Folks who mind attachment miss out on life.

The heart wants what it wants!
It simply fulfills a soul contract.

Neither mind, nor heart have all the answers,
yet, life always steers us in the right direction.

Once in a blue moon a fork in the road arrives.
There will be drum rolls, fog and twilight.

Left or right, proceed or stop?
The answer shall present itself!

How to solve the Gordian knot for good?
Life catapults us Home every step of the Way!

Unknown

Life is unpredictable and a continuous movement of energy.  Life is energy manifested in different forms and your conflicts arise when you identify with any of them.  You are not the forms.

There is a famous Tao story describing this phenomenon very well.  A man lost his horse.  His neighbor came over and said that they were sorry for his loss.  The man simply replied, “Who knows?”  A few days later, the lost horse came back with a herd of horses so the man ended up getting more horses.  His neighbor came back again and congratulated for his gain. And the man simply replied, “who knows?”

The man was riding and fell off the horse. His neighbor came over and offered their sympathy.  Once again, the man simply replied, “Who knows?” A war happened in the country where the man lived.  The king recruited men for the soldier.  Because of his wounded leg, this man was left behind.

Yes, life is exactly like that!  A lot of times we judge what’s going on in our life as bad or good.  However, the truth is that we never know what’s going to happen to us the next moment.  Life is a continuous movement.  We are the energy and not the forms!  Just let it unfold!

By Suzanne Yang

Keep peeling the onion

I assure you, when there is complete nakedness, utter hopelessness,  in that moment of vital insecurity there is born the flame of supreme intelligence, the bliss of truth.
(J. Krishnamurti)

Open up to all the anger inside, open to all the strange stories that are floating through your head and keep changing day by day based on your mood and voices. Open up to the pain, the frustrations, and the fears, without resisting any of this. When you do that something amazing happens. Your body fills with light, your mind becomes quiet, your belly fills with slaughter, and you feel free. You are nothing but energy floating in space. It happened to me, and I always end my notes these days with the same sentence, if I can do it, everyone can.

Keep peeling the onion until all the artificial layers of your being disappears.

Love Freely

To love freely is to love without fear and without asking for anything in return. In that state you are free from hurt, regrets, and are always free to leave. Your life becomes a celebration of whatever you do, wherever you are, and however you are!

By Suzanne Yang

What’s your soul mission?

Before it incarnates, each soul enters into a sacred contract with the Universe to accomplish certain things. It enters into this commitment in the fullness of its being. Whatever the task that your soul has agreed to all of the experiences of your life serve to awaken within you the memory of that contract, and to prepare you to fulfill it.
Gary Zukav

I am typing away happily as I work on my upcoming book, ‘Breaking Free’ and ask myself, is this a soul longing to get the gospel out to the reader who is on a similar Awakening journey, or is it just a simple ego drive to make a name for myself in the spiritual community? Isn’t it always a little bit of both anyway? Does it even matter in the end why I do what I do? My simple definition of a soul mission is a goal that makes our heart skip a few beats when we go after it!

Our life story is here to help us discover who we truly are beneath the hood. We are here to Awaken to the fact that we are not an ego, but that we are also able here to live a life that fulfills the avatar that we know as ‘I’. I got a glimpse of my soul mission when I was on a flight from Boston to Frankfurt in the winter of ’92. A friend had recommended M. Scott Peck’s ‘A Road less Traveled’, a book heralding my career as spiritual author and coach, never mind that it still took me 15 more years to manifest it. I finished it in one feverish read.

A Rabbi once said, ‘have two pieces of paper in each pocket, one claiming that this world was created just for you to express and find yourself, and the other to remind you that you came from dust and will return there.’ We have incarnated to playfully learn a life lesson, and can have fun and purpose doing so. Our ego does not have to be the enemy, it can in fact be the engine behind our soul mission. Along a soul mission we Awaken to our ego drives and conditioning as we burn the fuel of our passion, and as life steers us towards purpose, insight and love.

The Course in Miracles writes, ‘Humility will never ask that you remain content with littleness’. God knows our passions and fits our journey perfectly in the divine mosaic called life. God has Her ways to make us feel special, never mind whether others see our success quite the way we do. So if  you feel stuck, if you feel restless, if you feel frustrated, you may overlook an open door somewhere.  A little pain is part of the journey, a few failures go side by side with our successes, but the feeling of hopelessness and resignation is a complete waste of our creative powers. What’s your soul mission? Have you already Awoken to it?

She is in charge, always

Everything is of God, even our missed steps. They set us up for eating humble pie, because it is often only in times of struggle that we get ready for our next spiritual break-through. Guided by ego we are nothing but puppets in God’s Divine Maya. Controlled by karma, prior reaction functions and the expectations and fears of others and ourselves. We are always in Her capable Hands, even though we are too often miserable following our ‘free will’.

Glimpses of Awakening come when we become mindful of our ego, and especially when we see Spirit shining through. God still works through us, but we increasingly use our ‘free will’ to do Her Will. ‘Dark Night of the Soul’ episodes take place when old reaction functions want to get the better of us. Step by step we cut them all out, one after the other until we become free enough to follow Spirit no matter what. It’s a process though. We feel better, mostly, but the ‘Dark Night of the Soul’ moments still really hurt.

With the final break-through, Love, Power, Serenity, and Abundance are finally ours to embrace, all by just following Her Way. Life simply flows through us. We are happy, though not everyone gets our happiness. The power, love, and abundance others are after has little in common with God’s Kingdom, and that’s quite all right. The folks we hang out with get us, just as we get them. Which state are you in? Is it freedom you are after? Are there still self-imposed interferences we can help you removing?

 Once you sign up for the journey Home, a process gets set in motion that cannot be stopped. Delay is possible but you will feel like dying doing so. So make the jump today, move forward and just get the job done. You have no other choice anyway. Get a travel companion because in my experience whenever two are gathered in Her Name, the journey goes more than 2 times as fast. Soon you also will realize that no matter what state we are in, She is in charge, always!

Peaceful in the busyness of life

If you can only feel peaceful when you are alone, your peace is very limited and other people will constantly become a disturbance for you, the world will become something you have the desire to run away from. May we feel peaceful wherever we are, and whatever we are doing.  May we all have this freedom and courage to experience and enjoy our life to the fullest!

By Suzanne Yang

High Energy

I can always spot high cosmic energy in my own body. There is a level of inner serenity and well-being that is brimming. Yesterday I once again felt the energy running through me, activated by rhythmic breathing. You feel a vibration in your head that reminds of a pleasant dream but you know that you are conscious. Deliberately I flipped channels from my body to my loved ones, and even the folks that normally I don’t feel so found off. I was aware of my body, yet I felt beyond it. I could feel the serene loving energy when I switched my consciousness to the people I care for, and even when I switched my consciousness to the folks I normally don’t appreciate so much, I didn’t feel anything but appreciation for their part of the movie plot.

Last time when I wrote a note like this someone accused me that I was fishing for enlightenment status. Well I am not. You should see me when someone cuts me off in Boston traffic, or if my wife comes home and tells me about the ruthless business transaction at her work place. Yet, the feeling of kundalini rising is real. I have experienced it multiple times and I am not even a committed meditation expert. I do think we should compare notes about what this Awakening process is all about, and many of my friends have already shared their kundalini experience with me. Rest assured, if I can experience this serene kundalini energy, everyone can.

When Your Ego Dissolves

When your ego dissolves, whatever happens to you loses its grip on you. You just return back to consciousness and watch whatever is happening to you with curiosity. You realize you are just like an actor playing out a play on stage.  Whatever the movie plot unfolds doesn’t matter so much for you anymore.  You just let it be.

What does matter to you though is, what this moment, what this energy is here to teach you.

By Suzanne Yang

Awakening to ‘It’

There is a strange transition unfolding in the Bible over time. Our God notion transitions from a vengeful and jealous God to a loving one as humanity evolves. God doesn’t judge! Everything you experience is nothing but a dream you once will Awaken from. Why would God, and you for that matter, judge anyone for something that happened in a state of dreaming? I had exactly the same experience of outgrowing judgement. The ‘Dark Night of the Soul’ episodes ended when I stopped judging myself. These days whatever someone confesses something ‘dark’ to me, I always respond ‘God doesn’t judge’. It’s true!

Life will face you with whatever you need to leave behind until you are ready for transcending to the next spiritual level. Instead of bemoaning this fact of life you could rejoice over it. You have paid the dues, maybe today is the very day to break free from your past. What messages have you been overlooking? What pain body have you not healed enough to finally let go? ‘It’ is the vast subconscious you carry around, and the homework you still have to tackle. Addictions, anger outbursts, procrastination, self-destructive behavior, questionable love relationships, or whatever else bothers you, everything is designed to help you Awaken to ‘It’. Instead of beating yourself up over your temptations, just embrace life to the best of your abilities, try again and see what happens.

I wouldn’t call myself enlightened, yet I can tell you that I no longer experience fear the way I used to. I also no longer question the past and know in my bones that no matter what the outcomes, I did my best at the time, just as I am doing the best here and now. I am sure ‘It’ still has a few lessons in store for me and I actually look forward to facing them. The Course in Miracles states, ‘Nothing Real can be threaded. Nothing unreal exist.’ There is an incredible peace realizing this fact of life. If I can experience this peace of mind, so can you. Awaken to ‘It’ and create something Real today.

Let Your Love Shine Like the Sun

Let your love shine on the world like the sun,
And watch over your friends like the moon,
Let your love hydrate people around you like water,
and comfort them like a summer breeze.
Let your love envelope this earth with light,
and relax and recharge every being like a dark silent night.

By Suzanne Yang

It’s OK

Still a little arrogance to catch,
and some ignorance to realize.
Misunderstood love and
excessive clinging are hurdles.
Restlessness, anger, prior cuts,
soul longings and irrational cravings
all have to be worked through.

Do I really need to go on?
You have a life to live.
Rest assured, the Beloved
waits for you even more longingly.
Yet, She created this world
to bring you Home
on the fastest way possible.

Still a little work ahead—it’s ok!